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Hmmm.
I guess I’m not lonely. I’m single. Sure it stirs up feelings of loneliness.
Plus there are a lot of married men that share the same misogynistic views as incels on women.
A lot of married men are incels.
Is this a wife=bad joke? :o
No, I actually agree. Hear me out: think conservative Christians who married the first person they dated, because sex outside marriage = bad. Then stay together because divorce = bad. So both wish they could have had other experiences and may well be something akin to “incels,” if not outright. I know many, many, many people like this.
That is definitely part of it. Some of it is also people who got married and had kids and found themselves in sexless marriages after some time, but the idea of going through divorce and splitting up belongings and assets and fucking up their kids seemed worse than just continuing their relationship with their hand. Especially as people get older, sex drive drops off for some.
There’s too much loneliness going around regardless of gender, so no, a sweeping generalization about an entire group probably isn’t the most helpful idea. Nor does it address the real problems.
Yes, but as wise Reddit teaches us, being misandrist and signaling your lack of empathy for men’s struggles is one of the indicators of a wise and reasonable person.
Misandry is getting increasingly prevalent, and it does suck. But at the same time, at least on an individual basis, I can hardly blame people for it. I don’t know if I’ve ever known a single woman has never been assaulted by a man. The fact is we collectively do have to do better.
Being a victim doesn’t excuse bigotry. You can empathize with a person without excusing bad behaviors.
I don’t want to be subjected to hate and vitriol because of the actions of another person in an event that I wasn’t involved in… do you?
Bigotry, in all forms, is bad. Even if the bigoted person thinks they have a good excuse (they always do).
I remember one of my exes repeated a statistic a lot, “one in three women are raped at least once in their life.”
I don’t think you’re appreciating the challenge of these circumstances when “not all men” might literally be the exception, not the rule.
I’m the polar opposite of an incel. I don’t hate women, I respect them too much to subject them to my bullshit.
Is that called being a “vocel?”
I was thinking vol-cel, but yeah.
Or voxel?
Love how everybody here is hell bent on reinventing the word celibate.
You are the center of your universe, the only force that can ever affect you. Therefore, anything that doesn’t work out for you is all. Your. Fault.
You are responsible for all of your successes, and the lack thereof. And that is the essential point that failure, your ever-faithful friend, wants to make: that your failure could not exist without you – without your stupidity, without your lies, without your mistakes, your uselessness, your lack of faith, your ineptitude, your unjustifiable confidence in your alleged abilities, you stupid loser – failure is your only friend. Failure is your only lover. Failure is your only hope.
So befriend it. Make love to it. And believe in it with all your might. Because failure is all there is for you.
THIS IS A THOUGHT POISON
AVOID AT ALL COSTS
The thing standing in the way of your dreams is that the person having them is you.
; _ ;
Damn the reddit energy is crazy in this thread
Sir, this is a reddit alternative.
I can’t understand why people expect Lemmy to be less Reddit than Reddit. It’s literally a platform for people who are so deep in Reddit that they’ve developed a hatred for Reddit becoming more normie friendly.
As someone who has some interests aligned with average Lemmy users but not enough to use it as my primary platform, Lemmy is inhabited by the stereotypical Redditor of ten years ago.
I have the tendency to assume people are in Lemmy for the same reason as me and yeah, no, not really.
What do you use as your primary platform? If you don’t mind my asking.
I’m tryna diversify a bit more.
It’s literally a platform for people who are so deep in Reddit that they’ve developed a hatred for Reddit becoming more normie friendly.
Of all of the reasons I’ve heard for people leaving reddit, this has not been one of them.
They’re going to hate women even more because you said this
we could all stand to profit from being more compassionate towards each other
pp, no pp, does it matter really?
(hole is hole comment goes here)
The only difference is the stubble.
That is the only reason why they’re lonely. Nothing else. And as we all know, women have never been in a relationship with misogynists.
“Stop hating women”, “shower regularly”, “start working out”.
I’m fucking sick of this discourse. Fuck your just world fallacy.
This. It’s so incredibly immature and frankly really shitty to simplify it as “hating women”. Some people just have bad luck when it comes to dating despite their best efforts, and this sort of stuff really trivializes that and tries to put blame on them even if it’s not their fault. Not cool.
have you tried not viewing women as a thing you are entitled to?
if you start hating women because you don’t have luck in dating that is your own damn fault
I don’t hate women and I don’t view them as something I’m entitled to? I’m literally super protective of all the women I’m friends with in my life because I know how shitty other guys can be. You’re literally proving the entire point of my argument?
Have you tried actually listening to people and trying to understand what they’re saying?
Of course not.
It’s easier to construct a strawman and attack that so you appear cynical and smart than to have empathy and risk someone else getting the misandrist upvotes
Why are you making this a personal issue? The author was completely impersonal.
It reeks of a lack of life experience, either by young age or isolation from the world. I can’t disparage the author because I do feel what they’re feeling because this is a cause of loneliness, but at the same time, bad things do happen to good people. People suck. It happens every day. Sure, there are contributing factors, but it’s a gross oversimplification focused more on blame than solutions.
It’s similar (but not identical) to the argument that homeless people must have done something to earn their homelessness. Some do, and many maybe even most could have made better choices, but it’s a complex issue. Anybody can end up in a bad situation simply because of bad luck. I’ve been around long enough to see this lesson repeated.
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Weird. I also don’t trust dogs due to their innate subservience to man. What are your thoughts on dandelions?
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I just dont trust them. Their name means “lion’s tooth” in many languages, and dates back to the 1300s in Europe, where there were no lions in Europe at the time.
Oh sure, the Greeks/Romans knew what lions were (leo) through their conquests, and placed them in their stars, but how did your average north european peasant look at the flower and say “yep, looks like a lion” or even “that’s a lion’s tooth” without this frame of reference.
There must have been other names for it, and yet none are so widespread as dandelion.
I just dont trust it.
Piss-en-lit in French.
Huh, is it not dent-de-lioun?
That’s where the English word comes from, but I was taught piss-en-lit for French: https://wordhistories.net/2016/07/21/dandelion-pissenlit/
People here are obsessed with putting them in salads.
No because they are constantly asking “what is a women”
Yes, and it doesn’t work.
Also I never really hated anyone, but was only close to hate my ex, because she was playing some silly games with me lately.
Troll bait to make men and women hate each other.
Studies show hyper individualistic capitalist society is dissolving all social relations and making us lonelier and more alienated
Incels: well it’s worse for men so we should focus on them
Femcels: well if it is worse then it’s there fault for being misogynist
… culture war continues, nothing gets solved…
I always thought that they hated themselves but took their anger out on everyone else.
Getting out of thst cycle is definitely a toughie.
Which feeds into itself and makes the problem worse.
I already stated openly on here that I despise women, but hear me out. I think mysoginy/misandry, racism, etc. are not hereditary. Nobody is born that way, it’s a learned or environmental behavior. A lot of men lack a positive feminine role model, usually the most impactfull person to fill that role would be their mother, but sometimes mothers suck, that happens and it sucks for any kid in that situation. So were else to look if not to the only person closest to you? Media? I think we can agree that women have been under- and misrepresented in media for a long time. So the real world is the only place left. But the real world is volatile, everything is dependent on luck or opportunities. As a kid, not everybody has the chance to for healthy and meaningfull relationships with the other sex. Sometimes you just get unlucky, sometimes life just isn’t fair and while others are playing in on the playground together, you have to lock yourself into a room to hide from the parental abuse or take care of problems that other kids don’t have. You miss out on so much essential character building that will be impossible to catch up on later in life. And here is the point where the hate starts. I don’t thing mysogyny nesseraly starts with men, I think it’s the desperate attempt of belonging from young boys that is often met with hostility, bullying and ridicule from young girls that manifests as the image they have of them for the rest of their lives. You surley can’t hold every woman accountable for that, but it only takes one.
As an adult and sane person I realize that about myself. I realize that I have a learned involuntary response to women based on how I was threated in the past. But I’m also mature enough to accept that for the betterment of everybody, I’ll be better of aline. Maybe if a woman would step up and show me that their actualy better than my experience makes them up to be. But here’s something a woman recently said to me that makes everything fall into place on why this hasn’t happened yet.
“Women don’t owe you anything.”
Why should a woman go out of her way and prove all the others wrong? Why go through the effort? Why take the risk? They don’t owe me anything and I have nothing to offer in return.
If I’m not the only one who feels that way, then this is an issue that will never be solved, only prevented. And I think it is getting better nowadays with the next generation and more representation.
So my advice is: “Girls, be nicer to boys, your words carry weight that you can’t know the consequences of. And while women will always have appeal on their side, men don’t. Either they’re accepted or they’re not, and that’s mostly for you to decide.”
Top 10 opening lines of all time. Take that A Tale of Two Cities.
This comment is intentionally insulting, intended to provoke engagement.
There’s a myriad of reasons why men might be lonely, and honestly I don’t think that being an asshole is necessarily correlated with being lonely.
I mean, it’s a joke. The question is just: is it a good joke?
In some ways, it punches up, and — ugh, I’m about to do the “explain the joke” thing — shows something interesting by putting a harmful effect of patriarchy on men (loneliness) next to a harmful effect of patriarchy on women and suggesting they’re connected. It’s a solid premise.
But in other ways, it’s not really punching up. Most men don’t quite benefit from patriarchy enough to make up for the ways they suffer due to patriarchy, so taking a jab at them by connecting the two is kinda shitty from that perspective.
Also, I think most men don’t really think about it, and just accept a toxic concept of superiority over women (and right to affection from women) as a fact of being a man rather than a flimsy consolation prize for playing along with a system that hurts them.
So it’s kinda bleak, leaving that part unexamined and just leaving it as a “you problem” while taking a more systemic view when it comes to the pervasiveness of men hating women.
You’re right, i’ll block them while the community is still small.
I know many, many assholes who are drowning in it. People can be into that!
Inb4 “nice guys finish last”
