Would you prefer to hold it for me?
Ok, since the solution to this problem hasn’t been provided in this thread, here it is:
Start calculating the fibonacci sequence in your head once you can start to pee: 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, etc…
The reason why this works is because the calculations use the exact same part of the brain that also causes pee anxiety. Just gove it a try, it works incredibly well. Usually I have a solid flow before I get to 34 and I’ve been using this technique for years so I go through the sequence quite quickly.
Just try it and judge for yourself.
I wish I could sit down when I pee, but my dick and balls are so long they get dunked when I do so. 😔
I know what you mean, my dingley dangleys are so big that i have to use a hand rail to support the weight shift when i unsheathe 😔
I can only sit on some toilets. Others are OK. Depth and curve of the bowl front.
I have never touched the water. And my balls have never been a problem here…
Sitting or, more precisely, squatting is all in all more healthy for your prostate as well.
That’s Neil Kohney! Can recognize them testicular chins anywhere.
I never had this problem when I was younger. Until the day I had a medical examination to be drafted and they wanted me to give them a urine sample and I couldn’t. They offered me lots of water (which I drank) but still I couldn’t pee for what felt like an hour. Ever since I had problems relaxing.
Takes about that long for the water to get through you. It has to be absorbed but your digestive tract, adopted into the bloodstream and filtered out by the kidneys, all of which is pretty slow.
I’ve got this trick. Basically, I start relaxing the muscles on the way to the restroom. Not enough that there’s any chance I’ll piss myself before I get there. Just enough that by the time I’m in front of the urinal, it’s not difficult to start the stream quickly.
There was this one time I felt kindof bad about. went to the restroom where I worked (back before I was working remotely) and used “the trick” as usual. I get there, and there’s a guy at one of the urinals already. I peed, flushed, washed my hands, and left the restroom before he produced a drop.
Of course, in all likelihood, “the trick” won’t continue to work so well as my beard grows grayer, and some day I’ll be the other guy.
No thinking of waterfalls?
Honestly, leaving ultra quickly is the kindest thing you can do if he’s struggling.
Pissing with shy bladder protip: Do some multiplication tables in your head. What’s 7x6? 8x6? 4x12?
Takes up enough concentration that it easily starts to flow. Made this trick up years back and it has never failed me.
I just stand there and go pee.
Pissing with shy bladder protip
I just stand there and go pee.
That’s a pissing without shy bladder protip, that is.
bullshit. you dont have to sit pissing in a stall
that guy looks like the dad from cloudy with a chance of meatballs lol
The solution to this problem is simple: Just don’t use a public bathroom… the world is a giant, enormous shitter with endless and diverse opportunities to more or less hide behind something and let it flow.
Why let yourself be trapped and domesticated? Your Dick wants FREEDOM!
I always thought this comic was upvotes because the absurdity of it is funny, not because it’s a thing that people are actually anxious about and therefore relate to.
Oh it’s definitely a thing which makes it funnier on top of the absurdity.
one day you’re the dude with the hair, then you grow a mustache or something idk how this universe’s power scaling works
Meh I quit worrying about his ages ago. If someone has something to say I get ask them if they are a perv.
Imagine me opening Lemmy during my pre movie piss at the urinal only to see this. I hate how accurate this is, but it’s amazing. I get nervous pee sooooo bad. It’s like everything just freezes up lmao.
Just vocalise your internal monologue like you’re on dragon ball z and then start making sounds like you’re powering up your ki in your bladder and then blast the porcelain with a urine beam!
Imagine not looking at your phone while pissing in a public bathroom.
So that’s why there’s so much piss on the floor
So what? Everyone needs to be held once in a while, including my weener. It’s very comforting.
