Reminds me of McRaven’s commencement address… Sometimes, no matter how much you try, you still end up a sugar cookie.
The company doesn’t care about you. The company doesn’t care about you. The company doesn’t care about you.
Research the business before you decide your entire future on the decision. PayPal have a long history of this shit.
Why do
LinkedIn users write their essays
In this format? Many other platforms
Have the same limitations for character count
Or even lack of rich text formatting
Yet people don’t write like this.
Where did this
Culture come from?
Most business people are too stupid to handle paragraphs with more than 2-3 sentences. I’m not joking and I literally have to write emails like this if I want them read.
Side rant here. I’m working on a project for a new application, after a couple months work I finalised the 150ish requirements, however before approval could be given to approach businesses I had to fo some internal box ticking.
I organised this technical meeting with the IT guys to run through all the requirements, tick and flick that everything was fine. It was a 3 hour meeting that I had book 7 weeks in advance to ensure everyone could attend.
3 weeks before the scheduled date a general manager insists on attending and self-invites. The moment the meeting starts the GM immediately says “they don’t want to read all these requirements” and “don’t you have a presentation?” Followed by “where are the pictures?”.
The entire meeting basically derailed there and we only made it through maybe 50% of what we needed with zero ticking or flicking. That was 3 weeks ago, the project has almost stalled now and I’m still trying to recover the time/progress/momentum I had.
Fucking managers and their demands to be included and flat out refusal to read.
Functional illiteracy is a thing, pretty sure my last boss fell into this category. Everything had to be a meeting, couldnt do work by email or chat. He had to review and approve my reports, and they would sit for months. I think there was a nine month back log when I left.
Holy crapoli, the memories this triggers. Suffice to say I am soooooo glad to be retired.
I’m on a 12 month contract at the moment but the company just advertised 8 permanent jobs at my level. I’m passing on submitting an application.
Too long paragraphs, didn’t read.
Yep I have learned to write biz emails in short, pithy sentences, if I want people to actually read and assimilate the info.
I don’t think it’s stupidity (and nothing against stupid co-workers if they’re trying), but they’re just so grindset brained into mental exhaustion that they literally zone out in the middle of a paragraph.
I’ll catch myself doing it on occasion too. If anything it’s worse recently, because I’ll have the nagging thought did they actually write this or am I reading two sentences puffed out into half a page by llm…
Not too lazy to make it readable
Assholes thinking their garbage thoughts are poetry
I’m pretty sure…
You’re not gonna believe this but…
I think it all came from web marketing guru funnel-builder-ebook-masterclass-mentor-course types.
And it circlejerked with business types to capitalize on shorter and shorter attention spans.
I was like you. I was a normal guy. And one day I decided to take a guess at where this irritating “writing style” came from…and why it was EVERYWHERE…
…and you won’t believe what I came up with (Or maybe you will, because you’re ultra smart, I can tell just by the way you’re reading this, you’re not like everyone else, you’re special, click the button at the end of this really long pointless babbling)…I think it’s because…
People scroll, and short little paragraphs keep you reading.
In bite-sized little chunks. So you keep scrolling and scrolling waiting for it to get to the point…
…so what are you waiting for? Lame call to action by clicking the button below to get added to my email list with 900 days risk free…
…and one day you too can have a Lambo.
…Ugh that made me physically sick writing like that even as a joke LOL.
Bravo. A masterpiece.
Good god this is so fucking draining
Isn’t it insufferable? Agh!
I hope my version was at least sorta funny while making the point and highlighting a lot of those stupid tricks they use.
Absolutely, yes, it was good satire. Please, don’t do it again
I guess it works too, I just read that.
I hope it was at least satirically entertaining and perhaps a touch cathartic! XD
I’m sure you’ve also shared that same experience I have, where you ended up scrolling and scrolling those stupid websites to see what their deal was, even though you knew it was 100% nonsense lol.
Edit: Oh gosh, I had too much fun with it and now it’s 7x as unhinged lmao…
He should lawyer up. If you’ve signed contracts, rented apartments and genuinely relocated for this, it should be an immediate lawsuit.
I feel for this guy.
But I’ve also learned a valuable lesson in my travels: never, ever quit an existing job until after you’ve started your new job.
Not just accepted the offer, but attended your orientation day and got your new badge in hand. Then give your resignation.
Yes, I’d love to give my coworkers more of my time for offboarding and project hand-off, but in this world you have to look after yourself first. It sucks, but it’s how it is.
Never give a two-week notice. When you do that, your current employer may give you a new offer, but if you accept it, your tenure will not be the same, since you’re now seen as a flight risk, and they’ll look for a way to dispense with you and replace you within a year, or two, max.
If you’re in Germany, don’t do this.
Please never explain.
OK 💖
Yeah this wouldn’t work in other European countries either.
I mean it’s not really needed in Europe where true legal rights exist for employees, right?
This is more of a “only in the USA” kind of thing.
Yup.
I had to get it out of my last role but I liked a lot of the people I worked with. So I gave a 60-day resignation. Which would give them time to bring in a new person to fill the role. And give me time to hand over different platforms and processes. And teach him how to do the job.
24 hours later I was laid off on the spot and my accounts all shut down.
Now a month later they have hired a new guy and he’s messaging me on LinkedIn begging for help.
I feel sorry for him. But fuck that…
Offer to help for an extremely petty consulting fee
I probably should. But I’m pretty stubborn when I feel betrayed.
I’m sorry, but if a prospective employer is asking me to do seven rounds of interviews, I’m going to take that as a giant red flag that they a.) don’t respect me or my time and b.) are woefully incompetent at every other aspect of their business.
The giant red flag is the name “PayPal”.
I did three interviews once with a company. Even shadowed someone. Never doing that again. It’s a complete waste of time.
It needs to be illegal for employers to waste too much of our time.
This goes for interviews, commutes, and other situations where an employee is expected to give up their free time for free.
Thie idea that we owe parts of our lives and self that were never agreed upon when signing the contract needs to go away. The puritan work ethic needs to go away.
And we will need unions to accomplish this.
If they had to pay people for interviews they’d probably be a lot snappier about the process.
Like, sure, I’ll do nine hours of interviews if you’re paying me $100/hr.
I’m glad I don’t work a job where they give tasks as part of interviews. I’d want to invoice them for my work if they did.
Best job I had so far gave me an offer after a single interview, worst one (current) took three, I recently quit after getting another single interview offer, I’m optimistic.
I jumped through hoops like that once. Six or seven interviews with everyone from HR to one of the company founders, had to submit a freaking essay, only to be low-balled by the salary at the end; I ended up declining the offer. Biggest waste of time.
This was actually pretty normal for the last couple of tech jobs. Screening call with recruiter, phone screen with hiring manager, then a full-day on-site or zoom with 3-6 rounds. Sometimes, they would ask for a presentation about past work before the on-site. The number of rounds isn’t indicative of anything in big tech. Smaller companies do fewer and can’t afford to be as picky.
The problem is that after you’ve signed the offer and given your notice, you’re going on faith that the new company offer isn’t going to fall off. I’ve heard it happen a few times, usually when new company puts on a full hiring freeze.
It sucks, and the only way to mitigate it is to be talking to multiple companies when you decide to make a move.
Yeah. I have been in a poition doing the hiring for over 10 years now and so far never ever needed more than three contacts with a possible employee. (Beide administrative things, like finding a dafe for an interview,etc.)
First contact Is via phone(or mail or a combination of both)if I find anything in the application that leaves questions open or is inconsistent.
Second contact is the actual interview. Nowadays m company is so small that we can do them “with the team”, back in an earlier job that was not possible - so part three was either an long interview with the team or (preferably but not always possible) a day working with the team. (Whicu is of course payed at the same rate everyone gets)
But in my country we have to reimburse peoples travel costs and “trial tasks” during interviews would need to be payed as well.
My last position I got called in and the sentence I was given was almost the same. We are letting you go and want you to know this is not due to any performance reason its just a business decision.
If anyone is surprised by PayPal’s conduct, they shouldn’t be.
never work for paypal. scumbags. he got what he deserved for flirting with satan. fuck paypal.
Capitalism. Cruelty Is the point.
People have been falling for the lies of big tech companies for too long. We desperately need unions, and those unions need to push back on these kinds of ineffectual, time-wasting hiring processes.
Look at this asshole though. The image cuts off right when he’s starting into the mealy-mouthed hustle culture part of the linkedin post. Gotta show that you, special magical you, are the one developer who doesn’t mind the exploitation. You stay positive and give 110% to everything, even when they’re fucking you over.
There’s always a stupid as shit hustle bro willing to scab and do the work, they can vibe code through it I guess. If this god forsaken industry had any solidarity at all, then no tech company you’ve ever heard of would be able to hire a single person any more.
Ill join a union if everyone else does.
That’s the point.
I know. However, with AI management will just take the 10% that choose not to join and give them the additional 90% of work, then hire offshore people to cover the rest. Their profits wont increase but theyll still make out like bandits because labor is cheaper.
H1B Visa workforce is the wave of the future. The Sociopathic Oligarchs are angling to create “Freedom Zones” where they will build their new facilities, complete with living facilities for their foreign workers. They will operate independent of government regulations of any kind. Skum is already working on it.
It’s literally how they use foreign workers in Arab countries. They usually use Indians or Filipinos, barely pay them, and strictly limit their personal agency. It’s literally slavery.
It’s coming to America. We can always pick fruit.
Christ. Yeah Ive seen the chinese shacks next to a 40 story luxury building. They barely treat them as animals let alone human.
I’ve seen it when passing thru Dubai.
Very hard to be team human when you see what we do to our own.
Yeah world has just gotten shittier for the bottom. No one truely cares about ending suffering as long as the rich doesnt have to endure it
Peter Thiel is evil. Don’t work for him. Don’t use his products.
Theil holds Vance’s leash, tightly. If Vance becomes president, Theil becomes president.
You’re more likely to have his products used against you, by your government and the corporations that rule you.
As evidenced by his preposterously plagiarized company naming schemes that obnoxiously demonstrate to the world how profoundly he missed the point of Lord of the Rings, by going team Mordor and thinking he’s the hero. . .
When above all else, he desires power.
“…ask if you have given every bit you have during the pursuit”
.
GTFO with that, no sympathy for themAm I supposed to feel sad for a binance bro interviewing for mf paypal? I have more empathy for a rhino poacher.
