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A seating chart for an “8 HOUR FLIGHT” with the text “PICK YOUR SEAT” at the top. The chart is composed of 10 numbered seats, each occupied by a different famous Republican politician or public figure, or the devil. Each number represents a seat, and each seat is either adjacent to or between one or two different individuals.
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Pilot seat, so I can crash the plane and do the world a huuuge favor
You’d go down a hero
o7
2, as a Anarcho Syndicalist Jewish Transfem (with Autism) I would annoy him for the entire flight. The way I see it you can either let them punish you or you can become the punishment, I know which one I’m choosin.
Easily 3, looks like The Number Devil to me.
On the wing… The left wing.
i bet 2 would share his drugs so 2
4 maybe as well, but don’t let the prudes in 6 see or they’ll call the cops, and don’t let 9 see or they’ll hog all of it.
Pilot seat cause I’m gunna crash the plane
9, I might be able to talk em into letting me cop a feel while getting an angry handy. Or satan, he’s probably got good stories.
This.
Watch for hands from the seat behind you though…
It’s so freaking hard to choose because I want all of those seats.
It’s not a matter of not wanting to sit next to them it’s that I want to make all of their trips as horrible as possible.
I think if I had to though, I’d take 10 if it was the middle seat. I’d spend the entire trip punching them in the groin.
4 Alex would be the most entertaining of the bunch.
I can ask him about this gay frogs and Sandy Hook
See if you could get him worked up enough to be duct taped to his seat
Seat #7
I could probably find some kind of entertainment-value by talking to Hulk Hogan about “wrestling” or his career. The turtle will probably just sleep, or remain frozen in a transient-stroke-like state. Seems like the easiest.
In reality, it wouldn’t really matter which seat I chose. I always go right tf to sleep on planes; because no, I don’t want to talk with you, stranger
Though… maybe not next to Vance. I don’t want him getting any weird ideas about my seat, if I were to get up to use the bathroom
Next to Hogan I’ll at least get to hear his absurd lies and he can tell me stories about wrestling, though the stories won’t be accurate.
I’m between Green and Boebert, I might get a handjob but I’ll get a brain aneurysm… Tough choices
At least you’ll go out feeling good, which is more than most of us can hope for on the capitalist hellscape of a planet.
#3. Satanic temple is surprisingly wholesome
#3 is a trick. That’s Rick Scott and the guy to the left of #6 is a decoy.
Is it Satan, though? Looks like a just a common devil. He would probably just try to talk you into some dumb contract and fail in an amusing way. No racism, no shit talking, no being asshole, kind of a polite guy.
OK, maybe slight smell of burned sulfur but that would be it.
I am descended from Gaels, the devil is gonna sign its soul to me. Ya think the devil can rules lawer his way into owning my soul, nope I will rules lawer into owning his sould and make it benefitial to both of us so as to get another pet devil and another and another ad infinitum.
not 5, because i don’t want to get in between vance and a nice empty seat.
10, and I would pay to do it.
Give me some one on one time with Linsey I think I can talk him out of the closet.
How many would choose seat #3? I would.
