Parents use these names because it’s the pique of their cleverness.
There is a clear socioeconomic divide between those who do and do not do this and it is exactly what one expects to to be.
X Æ A-XII enters the chat.
Honestly this is bullshit. Some of the most ridiculous names I know are from old money families here in the South.
New money types definitely do this too.
And some wealthy Utah mormons
Wealthy southerners aren’t immune to trashy behavior. They’re just oblivious to the trashiness.
They’re forcing their lack of ingenuity onto another generation and ensuring their garbage legacy.
There was a golfer at Augusta national and her first name was Asterisk.
I wonder if their other children are named comma, semi colon, or parentheses?
Maybe Obelix and Idefix?
Obelisk and Getaflix
Kitchenaid Whiskey Jones is an awesome name
Postmaster General Ford Lincoln Mercury.
God, what a great name and a great movie, thanks for bringing it to the forefront of my memory.
That’s a bar I haven’t heard for a long time…
My last name is Browning, like the gun manufacturer (distant relation). I used to joke that if I ever had boy/girl twins I would name them Colt Winchester (boy) and Biretta Glock (girl). I nearly got Colt for my youngest, but there were too many kids named Colton around.
I also really wanted to name my first son Charlemagne. This was because back in high school when we studied the Holy Roman Empire all the girls in class were talking about how Charlemange was such a beautiful sounding name. I figured that he’d have to put up with some shit growing up, but it would all pay off because not only would he wind up with a name that people loved to say, but he’d also be resilient and hopefully with a solid sense of humor.
My wife vetoed this nearly as soon as the ring was on her finger.
These haters are idiots.
I have firearms-oriented first and middle names, and it’s fucking awesome. Instant cred with people usually suspect of others, AFAIK never a negative issue. If I had met a young woman named Biretta Glock in high school or college, I think we would have been forced by everyone in America to get married in the spot.
Charlemagne Tha God proves you right. Though that’s also a great Tomboy girl name, with Charlene or Charley for short. See “The Long Kiss Good Night” for further validation.
Long Kiss Goodnight is a criminally overlooked movie
My head canon is that it’s the pilot project for the Bourne project. It’s probably loosely based on the Bourne books from the 80s.
Criminally underrated is actuate. It’s on my top 10 movies ever. Great writing, hitting all the tropes, Samuel L. Jackson in his prime.
And Geena Davis was always cast as a sort of girl next door and to be the badass she was really showed her range.
Jesus christ you’re awful with names for your kids.
I hope you two didn’t choose the name that has the beautiful meaning of “lightbringer” and end up naming one of your boys “Lucifer”
Hey, don’t bring little Lucy into this! He already has enough trouble.
morningstar, apparently Samael is “venom of god” so that isnt a good one either.
Here’s an idea, one should not name kids after characters considered bad or evil. EVEN IF IT COULD BE INTERPRETED MULTIPLE WAYS.
You could sell Charlamagne as “Charles for almost anything except when he wants to show off”
That’s a good point, Incubator
Incubator Jones? Of Memphis, TN?
Just give them something normal humans dont know 8billion people. Their name will still likely be unique in their small network of people who know them.
Unless you have a super common last name, then just don’t name your kids shit like Mike and John. I have friends in that position and while it’s character building to have the same first name as someone in your class, it’s really inconvenient to have the same first and last as someone in your class.
I think labeling “Kitchenaid Whiskey Jones” as “borderline” is too lenient. “McKeinsleigh” I think is the borderline one. Marijuana Pepsi managed to make something of it – ironically writing her PhD thesis around it – but I would be thinking forwards and backwards about what a name I give could do to a living, breathing person their entire life (even if they get it legally changed).
All these parents should be catapulted into the sea. I don’t know what you’re talking about.
I’ve always told people pick a name for your child and unless there is a realy good reason don’t name them after yourself. Then say the name out loud a few times, if you can see a respected doctor,CEO, and janitor having that name then you picked a good one. Middle names are free space and that’s where you can be “quirky”
Major Major Major
Pine. Wished I could still use pine as an email client.
Ding dong Dear Strong Bad,
How do you type with boxing gloves on?
Crapfully yours,
dumples
C G N!
… U!
Proceeds to name her son Richard
I remember reading about some girls literally called ‘undesired’ on their language :(
I mean, I’ve met girls called “Chastity” which is weird as fuck if you think about it for half a second.
It’s naming them for a supposed ‘virtue’ it may be hoped they possess.
Same deal as naming girls Grace, Charity, Faith etc. All are ‘virtue’ names.
I personally dislike it, but it’s pretty well-established.
Yeah I get the trend but naming your kids “doesn’t fuck” is just weird
Its like a whole gneration hasn’t listemed to Johnny Cash’s “A Boy Named Sue” ← (best Folsom Prison performance)
My name is Sue. How do you do? NOW YOU GONNA DIE!
I mean, I’m Tanis, it’s rare but I like it.
Rawdogging the internet with your real name is bold.
First and last. I’ve just never bothered to come up with a real username in twenty years.
If you show up at my doorstep I’ll make you tea and we can play a board game.
Well, looks like we’re both in the same city. I’ve met a Tanis here before. Wonder if it’s you
Prolly. Hey.
Same with me (only a couple years less since I think my earliest account is from 2008). Was just playing Peak with some people and they said I doxxed myself with my username. Told them anyone that wants to find me is gonna have to dig cause it’s a super common first and last name. There’s even a hockey player with the name (legit got asked several times in the late 2000s/early 2010s if I was a hockey fan since I had the username).
And I’m the only Tanis Nikana in the world.
Bravery? No. Laziness. And consistency.
Is that an invite?
I’m mostly operating under the assumption that people are too busy with their own lives to go stalk a married middle-aged lady.
I use to think so! Turns out sometimes it’s not true!
Meh, it’s not that bad. I don’t have my last name but it’s trivial to determine it, there are like 6 Zedds in the US.
You are named after an Egyptian/Greek city?
Nah, just an Irish first name.
Does that come from the word tanist then? As in named successor?
You got it! Plus it was really easy to render into kana.
Utah moms need to remember. One day, Brightlynn, Ayngylle, and Keighleigh will be 90 year old patients, playing gin rummy in a nursing home.
crystal methany, crystal methvin are names of 2 people who got in trouble for METH.
Peruvians take this to another level. There’s a professional soccer player named Osama Vinladen, and his brother is Sadam Huseín
There’s a town mayor election where the candidate Lenin lost to…eventual winner named after THAT Austrian artist
