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If they teach crabs how to read, there’s a risk their society will advance to the levels seen in Carcinia, leading to a downfall of overcleanliness as king camtcha bleaches the city against the advice of his wizards, throwing the entire old ocean into disarray.
wow…Kaspersky really sucks now, huh?
What do you mean? It’s great for russian intelligence.
Carcinization!
“Wait, what? Why?”
Everyone needs a hobby.
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[x] Teaching crabs how to read
click
[ ] Teaching crabs how to read
phew, bullet dodged
Who could have gotten that Strairdrac, the Netherwatcher would sell forbidden knowledge?
I mean, crabs are dangerously enough already with those strong claws, do we really want them learning how to read too? Think about it….
[taps forehead meme]
Kaspersky
For a computer security program it is overreaching to the point of ridiculousness.
Teach the crabs how to read and the next thing you know lobsters will be doing the tango. It’s a slippery slope my friends.
Lobsters don’t die due to old age. Instead, they end up at the seafood buffet or die from exhaustion during moulting – the process where they replace their shell due to their increasing size.
https://www.unsw.edu.au/newsroom/news/2022/09/what-lobsters-can-teach-us-about-immortality0
If they read the above then they may figure out to stop moulting and live forever. And imagine the knowledge they could accumulate!
This design baffles me. If you have your parental software set to block certain things, sure. But why would it need to snitch on attempts to access specific content? If your kid is smart and able to bypass the filter you’d never be notified anyway… So either block it or don’t!
And pass such an amazing opportunity to punish a child? And if the search is bad enough, you can even beat them up, isn’t that delightful?
Hmm, I do love beating children… At Mario Kart!
Forbidden knowledge… You must forget the crab people…
Taste like crab, read like people
Russian spyware.
I mean you are not wrong but also they do do legitimate work when daddy kremlins not making them do butt stuff to unwitting cx.
Russian spyware over US spyware over Chinese made hardware.
And at the very top runs Google Chrome, aka corporate spyware.
There’s a list of things to not mess around with. Crabs are a bit lower than squirrels, but not by much.
Wait, you are capable of taking care of what your child accesses online without the government censoring the internet for everyone??? That’s impossible!
Fascists hate this one simple trick!
It’s labor doing it in the UK. It’s the people who people label fascists saying the internet should be free, at least there. In the US it seems to be the opposite.
Maybe the problem is authoritarians.
Always has been.
If crabs could read there would be no stopping them.
Probably bears too.
I mean the literate crabs would look creepier. But I could probably take them down with a flame thrower and some butter. Bears on the other hand, I’m not so sure.
