• BallShapedMan@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    “If someone met your expectations would you be mad?”

    “No”

    “Then maybe your expectations are too high?”

    • spooky2092@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      2 months ago

      Was that supposed to be ‘did not meet your expectations’, or was your therapist on something that day? Cuz I have no idea how not being mad at expectations being met means they’re too high.

  • kjett@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    It’s minimal how you can change other people. But you can change your own environment, actions and worldview. Even though it might take a long time for your body, nervous system and brain to change and adapt.

    Even if your parents want to change themselves for the benefit of your health, it might not be possible for them. But you might be able to help them by changing yourself, and then indirectly change their environment.

  • Philharmonic3@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    If you can’t stop thinking about the worst possible outcome, try imagining the opposite. A nice and comfortable situation that makes you happy. To take up space in your thoughts and orient you towards more pleasant emotions

      • Philharmonic3@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        It’s not about changing the outcome, it’s about stopping anxiety. This advice was given to me for use when feeling anxiety that is debilitating about a potential worst-case scenario which is usually unrealistic

      • Lv_InSaNe_vL@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Outcomes are rarely determined by your own thoughts about the situation.

        It’s like being anxious about driving because you’re worried someone is going to hit you. As long as you’re being safe and careful, being an anxious mess isn’t going to make you any safer and it can even make things worse.

        Of course I’m not trying to say “just stop being anxious!” but you have to understand that only ever thinking about the worst case scenario will hinder far more progress than it will help.

  • shapis@lemmy.ml
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    2 months ago

    I was still a kid. At my first session I opened up hard. I spoke nonstop for the whole hour.

    When I was walking out I asked them “now what?” And they replied “Now it’s a long battle”.

    That stuck with me.

      • shapis@lemmy.ml
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        2 months ago

        Oof. Hard to say. I did it for so long and so early in life that I’m not even sure what would have happened had I not done it.

        I don’t like mental meds though. And I don’t think any of them ever helped me. They have always either made me extremely risky behavior prone or just numb where the days blend together and months go by in the blink of an eye.

  • cabron_offsets@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Hot take, but I’ve done therapy with like 4-5 different therapists over like 20 years and found it to be of little to no use. What’s been a lot more helpful is just living life with the intent of letting go of past wrongs and making sure that I don’t inflict them on others.

    • solarvector@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3 months ago

      I think the point of therapy is to help you effect changes in your behavior (mental and physical). Sounds like you were able to make some changes that help.

  • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    I’ll tell you my PERSONAL experience. I was on therapy and I learned to 1st Identify your triggers (what makes you feel sad? Is it the news? Is it specific news?! Like politics or violence? What ruins your day/week?). Once you know what makes you angry or sad you can actively avoid reading or looking for it. Block people that keep pushing it on you, remove communities that post about it, maybe even social media as a whole (Lemmy is the only social media I still have and it has been amazing for my menral.health). If you feel stable enough and in control you cam work towards changing it. You can be a volunteer or do some work for it.

    Finally, since in my case this wasn’t enough, I went to a psychiatrist and now take an amazing medication. 1 pill a day changed my life radically. I recomend

  • peregrin5@lemm.ee
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    3 months ago

    The advice is usually pretty common sense and likely nothing you haven’t heard before. The main benefit is having a safe space you can discuss your anxieties with a professional and having someone who will listen with minimal judgement. Also sometimes you need to be reminded of common sense when you lose sight of it.

    Basically it’s a paid friendship without all the other benefits of friendship.

    Honestly I wouldn’t be going if it weren’t fully covered by my husband’s insurance.

    • Tonuka@feddit.org
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      3 months ago

      Yes, but Cognitive Behavioral Therapy specifically also a lot about working together to implement some small-scale changes. These are based on what you call common sense, but beyond it just being unable to retain your common sense sometimes, it’s really easy to accidentally not act according to common sense sometimes despite possessing it.

      Yea

  • humanspiral@lemmy.ca
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    3 months ago

    Your misery cannot possibly be the result a structurally oppressive society, look at how well I’m doing. Now go kick your mom in the vagina and suck dick for therapy fares, and come back next week.

  • TheThrillOfTime@lemmy.ml
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    3 months ago

    Whatever assumptions you have about the universe and other people are wrong. They all want to connect and love/be loved.