raises head
“Money”
puts head back down
I go to restaurants alone when I’m out and about by myself, because a man’s gotta eat. But why would I choose to go to a movie theater by myself? I can just stay home and watch a movie for free, while being more comfortable. I go to the movies specifically for the event which is shared with the person/people I go with. Do some people go to the movies just to see the movie? Is the bigger screen that important?
Do some people go to the movies just to see the movie? Is the bigger screen that important?
Maybe they want to see it as soon as it’s released instead of waiting for it to be available to stream. Also yes, some movies are definitely better and more immersive on the big screen with the big sound systems, like space or adventure-type ones with special effects.
On the opposite, I don’t really get movie theatre as a social activity.
Watching a movie is a passive, solitary activity that you do in the same place and time as other people. It feels to me like it has the same social significance as meeting and then everyone checking their phone for two hours. Sure there is a shared experience at the end of it, but there are a thousand things you could do instead in order to experience things together, most of which more interactive and more “social”.
For me the only benefit of going with a friend is pushing each other to actually go and see the movie. But for myself, I have watched movies alone and didn’t find it significantly better or worse than going with company.
That and the sound I think? Maybe people enjoy being in a crowd while being entertained? I don’t know: it’s not for me.
The only thing the theater has that I don’t have is Atmos. I have a pretty awesome surround sound system at home. I know most people haven’t spent the time and money to set their house up the way I have though. I’ve thought about adding Atmos, but my ceiling is slanted, so it would be a challenge.
Yes, I enjoy movies with striking visuals or music much more on the big screen. I also go to the cinema alone from time to time. I’m rather introverted, so I don’t mind the solitary experience. I do like to later talk about the movie with someone who saw it too, though.
Is the bigger screen that important?
Depends on the movie. If it’s some drama or something a normal sized screen isn’t much different experience but like a huge action movie with large scale stuff happening the bigger screen adds to the experience. I went and saw Godzilla Minus One in the theater and it was amazing. Maybe if I had a nice home theater set up it would be different but if I’m not watching a movie at the theater it’s usually on my PC monitor at home or my small TV.
I have a 65" OLED, hooked up to a 5.1 surround sound system with floorstanding speakers, and a reclining couch, so I really only notice a big difference if it’s IMAX or if it’s 3D.
Sometimes the people I enjoy movies didn’t want to see the same movies, so I have gone alone to see something on the big screen. Not often since large flatscreens made most movies more enjoyable at home, but I would go slone if the situation came up again.
Honestly being alone or with people isn’t that much different when I’m watchijg a movie, unless they are distracting. The only thing I get out of going with others is talking about the movie sfter.
Movie theaters always seemed like such weird places to go to in general. I mean I get it if you go with a large friend group or to see a movie that has a lot of large scale scenes but for pretty much everything else it has literally zero advantages to make up for its major downsides.
Other people being noisy, no ability to pause, shitty audio quality due to bad placement, expensive tickets and food, having to go there and having to be there at a specific time, usually not being able to watch the movie in the original audio even when you do speak the language, pre-movie ads,…
People always talk about it as this great experience but I feel there is a reason they have to put the movies in there first because otherwise very few people would be willing to suffer through it all.
Did you forget that within living memory options for watching movies at home were limited to tiny televisions with poor sound, and what was either broadcast (possibly with commercials) or what you could rent at a store?
“Always seemed like such a weird place to go” if “always” is limited to like “after 2010” maybe.
For those of us without 100" 4K HDR TVs and perfect speaker setups, yes it is worth it. Not for every movie but there are movies I am very glad to have gone to the theater for because watching it at home on a 24 inch monitor and headphones is far less immersive and exciting an experience. Yes, even with popcorn crunching.
I know it’s the wrong take, but I read this as “Spend money you lonely bastard. Don’t address your problems, consume.”
Yep, you’re right it is the wrong take. I would suggest a little inward thought as this seems like a pretty toxic thought pattern.
Going to restaurants and movies gets expensive fast. If it’s just me, there’s no way I’m burning through my disposable income on that stuff.
As a former travelling worker, I ate a significant portion of my meals alone at a restaurant, never thought it could be perceived as weird before these memes started floating around reddit
I usually just chalk those memes up to teenagers who overthink everything or socially immature people. I often decompress at lunch by leaving the office and grabbing a meal alone somewhere.
I’m kinda reminded of that Kurzgesagt video on loneliness. The video talked about how people who experience loneliness begin to pay more attention to other’s expressions but interpret them incorrectly as negative.
I never heard anything about it as a teenager but both get to hear people’s opinions and have them try to force themselves into joining me ‘so I won’t be alone’ as an adult.
Definitely extroverts projecting.
That just sounds super boring. I’d rather get it to go and watch tv or something.
Eating without distractions is actually good for you. It’s what doctors recommend for a variety of reasons.
Why?
There are also mental health benefits iirc.
I have seen people express how weird they find people wanting to eat alone occasionally throughout my life, and even had some volunteer to eat with me “so I wouldn’t be alone”. When I say that I wanted to eat alone, they expressed genuine concern that it is weird to not want company. If I let them sit and talk then they feel good about themselves and leave me alone for a bit.
Honestly the pressure I got from being pestered about eating alone ended with me just eating lunch at my desk and I absolutely love work from home. Going out with coworkers once a month was plenty. They are fun and all, but most times I just want eating to be when I take a break from other people.
Depending on your situation, a big fuck off size pair of noise cancelling headphones (or if budget doesn’t allow, just headphones that looks noise cancelling), and being as absorbed into your screen as possible usually works. When I eat lunch on my own, I sometimes even furiously type out a long winded rambling and incomprehensible email to myself to make it look like I’m super busy. The people who see eating by yourself as a bad or concerning thing usually don’t see treating lunch as a work catch-up hour as a bad thing
I still do and prefer it. I also go to bars by myself on and off. A buddy of mine would decline going to lunch with anyone else so he could go decompress. About once a week he’d come back bitching because someone would go into an empty restaurant and sit as close to him as possible.
My favorite story of his complaining (rightfully so in my opinion) is where he went to a restaurant with benches around the perimeter and sat in the corner far from the only other customer there. He hadn’t been there two minutes before some woman came and sat on the bench seat closest to him and started asking him about the book he was reading and generally making small talk. He got so pissed that he ate in his truck for weeks instead of sitting down in a restaurant.
I think she was badly trying to flirt and didn’t have the situational awareness to understand that he was trying to get away. He thinks she didn’t want to look like she was eating alone and didn’t care that she was intruding on a stranger.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with offering to sit with somebody who’s eating by themselves (although I myself do prefer to be left alone while I eat, too), but Jesus Christ fucking ask first it’s not hard. “Hey, mind if I sit here?”. See? Done. That’s all it takes. 6 words. Just expect that you might get a no, and that that’s okay. Also, don’t ask after you’ve already sat down, or while you’re half sitting already
“Hey, mind if I sit here?”
“Yes.”
“Wow, rude.”
I once spent a week on a project with a colleague who’s, let’s say, kinda intense… You know smart guy and hard worker, but he always wanted to have the last word, whenever you explained something he never really believed you until he tried himself… Whatever, his work was ok, but as a person he was really exhausting. He left the customer’s before I did, the first evening I was alone I was so people-tired that I didn’t even go to the restaurant (it was in the hotel!), I stopped for groceries at a supermarket and ate in my room!
Come to Japan. Here, they have all sorts of seating at places specifically for people to be alone.
You’re making me want to book that plane ticket even more. The main thing I’m struggling with is deciding where I would go. If you don’t mind me asking, any favorite locations or cities?
Sure! I’ll go with what my friends recommended as well, since I haven’t travelled to all of the locations I want to go yet. Tōkyō is of course pretty bustling, and has a lot. Kyōto, Ōsaka, and Nara (i.e. the Kansai region) are all close to one another, so it’s a good area to visit and sightsee. Although, it can get incredibly crowded with tourists. Other places people mention they like are Sapporo in Hokkaidō, and maybe Fukuoka in Kyūshū. Also, what the other commenter mentioned is good advice. Feel free to PM me if you have any other questions.
Tokyo obviously, but the dotonburi (spelling?) market of Osaka is a must see. I’d also recommend Nintendo land at universal studios if you grew up in the 90s with those games, it’s incredible. And in terms of “plan before you buy the tickets” the Miyazaki museum is sold out months in advance, so many people will try to a reservation there before getting flights and hotels if they’re fans.
Aside from that, the deer in Nara are pretty special and it’s just a day trip from Osaka. And if you’re in the mood for something somber but incredible, Hiroshima is beautiful and the museum is incredible.
I don’t go places with people for social validation. I do it because doing those things by myself is incredibly boring.
It’s not that I can’t do these things alone. It’s that I’d rather have someone there with me.
I would go even further. I enjoy things much more, when I can share the experience with others. I could go out alone, yes, but why should I?
Very clearly not the point op is making at all
Like, the point they’re making and your comment are completely unrelated
As OP, I am blown away at how many commenters are missing the point.
Going to a spa alone is just weird tho. That feels like a couples or group thing
What? I feel the opposite you have big tourist energy when you show up there with a group, couples sure but I feel the spa is closer to a doctor visit or a haircut. You need the whole gang there?
From a business perspective, any customers please
Only if you care. I went to the local spa alone a number of times to have a decompression day in particularly stressful periods, never thought twice about it.
On the other hand, I’m autistic and have no frame of reference for some of the things I want to do. How can I just show somewhere alone without knowing the social norms?
I go to restaurants, concerts and other shit by myself all the time. I go some Sporting events by myself, even out of town. In fact, I’m going to take a nostalgia road trip and watch an indoor soccer match.
As long as you aren’t talking to yourself loudly in the theater or eating popcorn at a volume comparable to the Dolby, literally nobody will fucking care. In both cases, the solution is to close your god damned mouth.
Most people aren’t paying any attention to you at all. Unless you’re being loud or making a lot of quick movements they probably don’t even notice you beyond the generic recognition that another person is present.
there is literally nothing stopping you.
Except my obligations. I’m a parent with kids, so if I want to go somewhere alone, I need to get my SO on board and/or get a babysitter.
I know this is targeted at single people, but single people also have obligations and preferences that stop them from doing things alone.
Sorry, but nobody asked - that is a completely unrelated issue. It’s not about not having time.
The point of this post is that if you have no one to accompany you somewhere, you can just go alone, nobody cares - only you.
Sure, and that’s a given, no?
My point is that if someone isn’t doing something things alone, they don’t necessarily feel awkward, they could have other reasons to not go, and saying “but I have no-one to go with” may just be a socially acceptable excuse that they use to hide the real reason they don’t want to go.
Your point is not related to the subject at all. What do you not understand? The person in the screenshot does not address you or your like, they address specifically people not going places alone for fear of people looking odd at them, even though nobody cares.
You’re not in the picture, get over it.
”I’m gonna go watch this movie you don’t care about”
“Cool”
“Bye”
It’s not complicated and works both ways.
Yup, my SO does that sometimes, especially for Marvel movies because I’m tired of them.
Removed by mod
I’m married and eat alone regularly on work trips.
Normalise not finding exceptions to every single fuckin thing people say on the internet
Ok, breeder
Advice I’ve given my wife and my kids. Never make plans with anyone to do anything that you aren’t happy to do alone.
Dinner? I’ll eat alone
Movie? I’ll watch it alone
Wife isn’t in the mood? I’ll just lay in bed and beat it next to her.
Hiking trip? Alone in nature is great.
Worst case scenario you still get to go have fun. Middle case, next time that person asks about doing something you get to remind them about all the fun you had without them.
One of these things is not like the others
Yeah, hiking is the only one done out in nature.
But is it?
Secluded nature wank
Is the secluded bit a requirement???
For me it’s a preference.
Some hikes shouldn’t be done alone.
Also this seems like it’s gearing you towards selfish thinking which can set you up to be more isolated and lonely as a person.
I gear towards joining in things that others I like the company of want to do. I get to hang out with them while doing some activity, and they get to enjoy that activity. Of course, if I’m going to invite someone to something, it’s most often going to be something I can enjoy myself. If it requires others I just check with my friends on who’s interested and do followups with them to reduce barriers and increase their chances of making it.
That sounds like gearing yourself towards needing the validation of others to enjoy anything.
I’m not saying always do things alone, I’m saying make plans with the knowledge that the other participants might not show up. I’m not going to plan something that is reliant on others to happen, others could be there or might not, I’ll still go on the activity
So you never make plans you aren’t happy to do alone just to make your loved one’s day? Like I’m not crazy about X band, but my husband loves them, so getting tickets and taking him is something I do for him. But I’d never go to that alone.
I used to go to restaurants alone and I the last time I did it the waitress/owner started asking what I do and gave me the impression that she felt sorry for me.
Now it has been a while that I didn’t go. It wasn’t because of her but it I feel like it.
It is normal. Just do it. People who have an issue with this are creating their own problems. It’s a YOU problem.
Unless I’m traveling for work I don’t really want to go to the movies or restaurants alone. Living room and takeout is better.
It’s strange to me that this would be news to anyone. That said, as someone who has had so many wild experiences all alone, I eventually had the epiphany that none of it matters if you have noone to share it with.
At the end of the universe, there is a café with the last known entities that persist. They exchange stories, favorite experiences and say their goodbyes to one another, ancient and forgotten.
There’s a dreaded moment when straws are drawn or a volunteer is called to be the last one to turn off the lights – to herald the calling of the next universe.
No one wants to do it however, because the last one has to do it alone.
It’s in that quiet abyss, in the consuming darkness, the expanse and contracted void of dead light, where stars no longer shine, where trillions of lives existed and were extinguished – that an epiphany can be had, as one celestial appendage holds over the reset toggle:
Everything matters. Even if no one is around to experience it.
– Click –
