I know a girl who thinks it goes. she’ll make you breakfast. she’ll make you toast. but she don’t use butter, and she don’t use cheese. she don’t use jelly or any of these
she uses vaseline
wtf…
are you certain she wasn’t trying to kill an abuser?
It’s a song.
from where? the section on how to murder a cheating bastard the stupid way?
It’s I believe “she don’t use jelly” by the flaming lips. But also Vaseline isn’t that toxic to eat (I would not recommend eating it) especially if you were only using it to butter toast.
It’s just a fun, silly song.
Fun fact, the inventor of Vaseline recommended eating it, and ate it every day.
Chesebrough lived to be 96 years old and was such a believer in Vaseline that he claimed to have eaten “more than a teaspoon” of it every day.[6][7]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Chesebrough?wprov=sfla1
um lip balm?
This has been a game changer for my chronically dry lips. It stays on long and makes your lips look great! Plus they’re healthier. Couldn’t recommend it enough.
Protecting industrial components from corrosion
Wounds heal best when they’re kept moist, and traditional gauze bandaging actively dries out wounds. Stop the bleeding, and then smear a bit of Vaseline on top of the wound before putting a bandage on to cover it. The Vaseline will prevent the bandage from drying out the wound, allowing it to heal faster and with less scarring.
Isn’t traditional gauze bandaging supposed to be paired with a dressing, that would usually keep the wound from drying out?
I was raised to always put a bead of Neosporin under the bandage but that’s just Vaseline with some antiseptic ingredients
Yep! Perfectly good dressing for most minor wounds! Although I think the triple antibiotic hasn’t been shown to have much benefit when compared to Vaseline alone.
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Applying liberally to the orifice.
Not that orifice. Get your mind out of the gutter.
I meant a camera lens. uwu
To hide the wheels on the rig of your sci-fi hovering speeder, of course.
In that movie where that guy kisses his sister. 👉👈
In that movie where that guy kisses his sister. 👉👈
That’s the sequel.
Homecoming sluts 9?
putting it on fresh tattoos
Putting a layer just inside your nostrils to catch pollen and help with hayfever
I regularly do this. I have regular nose bleeds, and issues with a dry nose and this keeps it all soft and suple
A thin layer on new car battery posts when you put a new one in to help protect from corrosion. Cheaper than the anti-corrosion spray and you probably have some lying around.
It lets you use a snorkel mask with a mustache. (Clean the mask well though, it will destroy the plastic)
Oh dear I love the stuff.
MUCH better than aloe for sunburn
Lubricates and protects basically any metal, rubber or plastic
Stays slick when giving a massage
I suggest Gold Bond Extra Strength for your junk fellow dick and ball havers out there, prevents chaffing, heals if it’s already there, and as was told to me when I was first educated about it by a buddy on my wrestling team, “feels like tiny little fairy’s are gently blowing on you balls”. 10/10 would recommend
Eat it
Put in papercuts for instant relief
To quiet a squeaking hinge after misplacing my wd-40
Don’t use WD-40 for that. It’s not a lubricant, it’s a cleaner. Use silicone lube or oil instead.
Home made matches. Cut a strip of cardboard and dip the end in vasoline …light it. It’s flammable
Light it with what? Sounds like you don’t know how matches work
Fun fact: lighters were made before matches
