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- cross-posted to:
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I own a weaponized Roomba for home defense, since that’s what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. ‘What the devil?’ As I grab my powdered wig and activate my autonomous sentry unit.
It bumps into the first man. Click-clack. The mounted 1911 fires a .45 ACP round, dropping him instantly. ‘Good lord!’ cries the second, but the Roomba pivots, its optical sensors locking on. It unleashes a suppressed burst from the top-mounted M4 carbine, shredding his lace cuffs.
The remaining two try to flee up the stairs, but they trigger the tripwire. The Claymore mine strapped to the dustbin detonates with a deafening roar, sending shrapnel through the foyer wallpaper. The last survivor, trembling in the corner, thinks he’s safe until he hears the whirring. The downstairs Roomba Mop Combo engages its miniature, high-torque chainsaw. It drags itself toward him, cleaning up the mess as it goes.
These are called Doombas.
The chainsaw is the wrong direction to disenfootinate an intruder, Poindexter
You want to put the chainsaw boy flat so that it saws the intruders off at the ankle.
You mean the Ramboos?
What’s top left?
Also for some reason the chainsaw is the scariest.
A hot soldering iron would also be terrifying.
Claymore mine just to make this clear this can destroy an armored vehicle
Point towards enemy Stamped on one side
The spicy side.
Not to be a wet blanket, but wouldn’t the motion of the roomba moving immediately detonate the claymore?
To actually be a wet blanket, booby traps are illegal and demonstrate premeditation. Its a funny idea though
Premeditation? Yeah! I have a plan for an attack on my household!
Joking ofc.
No
Oh. Ok.
Follow up question: Why?
It’s triggered by a blasting cap assembly, which detonates when given an electrical signal. This can be done by tripwire, like you see in movies (video games have like laser trip wires, which I suppose are possible, but don’t know if they exist), or usually with a “clacker” (handheld detonater) connected by wire.
I have detonated one at a range before. It is pretty cool.
Burglar laughs. Then sees another roomba approaching the first with a blasting cap. “Oh, shit.”
Oh, that’s cool! I really had no idea but saying no was more funny than saying I have no idea.
They basically exist. Like the floor sensors if a garage door opener.
Yeah I thought it worked like the vidjas. Thanks!
Doombas was right there
I would just leave. Clearly this person is cooler than me, and if they had money they spent it arming even more roombas.
The Robber
It’s all fun & games until your dog attacks the robber, too, and winds up shot.
HAHA The chainsaw now that is crude 🤣
Claymore roomba? Now this is the kind of content I come to the Fediverse for!
Also known as a Boomba.
Maaaaan, how do you do it, I couldn’t have come up with “Boomba” even if I was high on churu.
I didn’t come up with it but somebody did and I appreciate their contribution to humanity.
I appreciate that the claymore has a camera attached… to the claymore. Hopefully it’s integrated with wifi and allows the user to drive the boomba. They’ve even circumvented the normal blasting caps somehow. Interesting choices lol but at least there’s conceivably a man in the middle pushing the X button.
New type of “man in the middle” attack.
But my lord there is no such force
