Ok but if you did before 10 am you might not wake up motherfucker
Another fun way to deal with assholes is to get a bunch of medium rocks and throw them into random places in the yard.
I happened to misinterpret the content on the bottom right part of the image for another bodypart :)
Yeah I thought it was muscles for a second too before I realized it was a cock
If you must have a lawn (e.g. HOA, personal preference), I strongly recommend doing away with this nonsense and go electric. Better yet, stay ahead of battery obsolescence and get a plug-in model, provided your yard is small enough. No more gas, oil changes, clogged filters, re-gapping spark plugs, and no more dislocating your shoulder trying to start the damn thing. Just keep the blade clean and sharp and it’ll run for a decade at least.
Or get a reel mower and call it a day
Just get a Makita or some other power tool company that lets you use the same battery for your drill, mower and a bunch of other things. Make sure it’s a reputable one where the ecosystem will be around a long time.
Imagine having property with a lawn to mow
Bro can hold his breath for at least 20 minutes
Lawns are friggin stupid.
Why are they stupid?
Just google this one it’s well understood
Monocultures such as lots with nothing but one kind of grass choke out local wild life. It is more beneficial to your local biome to have a variety of native plants taking up this place.
Also, immaculate green squares of grass with maybe a couple ornamental bushes are very boring and last century. Why spend time and money nurturing a sterile cookie cutter lot around your home when you can have a colorful, useful lot that nourishes you as well as local plants and animals?
Depending on where you live, grass lawns are often very wasteful when it comes to water usage as well.
This is all a moot point if you have a draconian HOA that will fine you for not having a lot that looks exactly like your neighbors. Maybe try to not move to a place like that.
The only reason we have them at all today is because they are mandated by obligatory setback distances for houses. We could be building our porches a metre or two from the sidewalk, the only reason we don’t are these stupid laws.
Man, the suburban house I grew up in would have been so badass if it had been surrounded by a multi tier porch fortress rather than a lawn.
Creeping thyme is so much nicer. Bee-friendly, mosquito repellant, smells nice, and you can eat it.
All this electric mower love in the comments and I’m looking at fixing the carb on my 20 year old gas mower because the arm broke off my electric after 2 years.
Did you crank it too hard?
and by mower I mean penis.
That’s why I leave my window shades open
This meme is as old as cranking mowers.
My mower always started first time, every time.
Because it was electric 😌
At a reasonable time of day
is that what they’re calling it now
Crank it with a shirt on next time. You cranked your dang nipples straight off your chest there bud.
Why would a man need nipples? Preposterous!
Is a man not entitled to the sweat of his nips? ‘No!’ says the man in Washington, ‘It belongs to the poor.’ ‘No!’ says the man in the Vatican, ‘It belongs to God.’ ‘No!’ says the man in Moscow, ‘It belongs to everyone.’
That reminds me of that thing Socrates said one day about a man and his nipples.
THAT’S NOT A BUG, THAT’S A FEATURE BROTHER!
In an assumption that those reading the comments here are lawn cutting folks, please consider not cutting your lawn at all, or if that’s not feasible at least reducing how often or how large an area you do it to. Nature cannot survive the onslaught of every home on the planet having a perfectly neat 10mm tall patch of grass and nothing else. We need diversity.
See the sidebar here for more information: https://slrpnk.net/c/nolawns
And sometime the HOA or even the city will complain.
Some cities offer guides or services for native plants! https://sfpublicworks.org/services/plant-lists-and-palettes
It’s even divided across the city’s different climate zones (San Francisco is small, but can have huge differences in weather from one side to the other).
I recall a SoCal city even offering free consultation for native gardens.
