I’ve actually skipped work just to help a homeless guy get his beard trimmed. Bought him pizza too. Kinda hard to get anywhere in life when you look like shit.

Be kind to the homeless, they just need a helping hand here and there.

What would you do?

  • Clinicallydepressedpoochie@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I’d give him a snack if he was desperate enough to come to my door. Wouldn’t let him inside but might come out to chat with him. Just to be sure they are well enough to carry on. Like, I didn’t have to call for medical assistance or something.

    It’s easy to say no when you’ve never been in that situation. I mean I’ve never been so out of it I’d beg a stranger to groom me but I have been completely on my own with nothing and no one.

    Any homeless person with good intent would know that cold knocking someone and asking to come inside is a bridge too far. So if they were trying that shit they would most likely be competely toasted or having a serious mental episode. Even more likely they are trying to steal your shit.

    I have had a homeless man come up to the door in an icestorm with no shirt on. The guy was soaked in alcohol and I did not feel safe. I did throw him a sweater, coat, and gloves because he could freeze but I was fucking terrified.

    • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      Thank you on their behalf for at least trying to help keep them warm during hard freezing times.

    • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      In my case, the ‘stranger’ wasn’t exactly a stranger anymore. Even though I had my own place to live with my family, I’d get tired of the home drama and I’d go ride my bicycle out to wherever my feet decided to pedal that night.

      There were two particular homeless fellas that I’d sometimes stop and shoot the shit with for a couple hours or so. Sometimes they’d even buy me a beer, just to have a friend to talk to.

      I never forgot their generosity. Never. I helped the older fella with a beard trim, some pizza, and a beer in return.

      The younger fella had been an album producer in the past, so I found him a fancy green suit about his size. Dunno if he kept it, but last I heard he actually got him a place in the next city over.

  • Dizzy Devil Ducky@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    Had something similar in 2020 happen. Things happened and it ended with him and my mom getting into a heated argument as to why he can’t get help from police or some other resources (which I can’t remember). Ended with my mom pretty much telling the guy not to return.

    He played the part of a nice person, but in the end he was trouble. So I think my answer to this would probably be not to trust them.

    • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      Oh, indeed, never fully trust any stranger. But do be willing to give people a helping hand, and sometimes a cautious chance.

      I’ve even met a homeless woman that took care of my friend’s car when he fucked up and got arrested LOL! No joke, this woman was legit. She didn’t exactly know where to take the car, and it took us like 2 days to find her, while my buddy was still locked up, but she never left town and we found her at the local McDonald’s.

      She was quite honest and decent about it too, apparently my buddy told her to take it, so it wouldn’t get impounded. So, even though she was homeless and all, she still had honor and decency. And yes, we returned his car back where he was staying.

      We still see the lady around here and there, seems she bounces from place to place and occasionally finds work. She might be homeless from time to time, but she’s genuinely honest and does what she can.

  • tobogganablaze@lemmus.org
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    1 year ago

    Can’t hear knocking on the door from the living room and my doorbell is disabled most of the time. So unless people notfify me of their visit there is a good chance I just won’t open the door at all.

    Also there is a big construction site in front of my house right now, so I’m wearing noise canceling headphone most of the time. And with those I hardly even hear the doorbell when it’s on.

  • Random_Character_A@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    There are some cultural differences here that affects the equations. If homelessness is taken care of that doesn’t mean there are no people on the streets. There will however be a a certain “enrichment” in what type of people are there.

    Our constitution demands that everyone must have a life worth human dignity. If somebody looses everything, gouvernment provides housing and funds for minimum standards of living.

    So for that reason, only ones that are on the streets are the ones who can’t/won’t take care of themselves, even if these things are given to then, but are not so far gone they could be institutionalized. Everyone is still free to get hammered and be on the streets.

    Very often these people have long history on substance abuse and have degraded to a level of a child. Police often picks them up, so they can be washed, because they often soil themselves. They are not dangerous, because then they would be institutionalized, but they are very smelly and often vocally abusive.

    Would I open my door to these people? No.

    I would give then food and water if needed, but these are not things they ask for.

  • Call me Lenny/Leni@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    I’m not a hairdresser and wouldn’t have confidence trimming a guy’s beard. Other than that, I’d let him in, get to know him a little, maybe give him a salad with water, and yeah the shower would be on the house, you think I’d charge for a scent cleanse using Earth’s most abundant resource? I just hope he brought clothes, unless he doesn’t mind wearing women’s clothes.

    • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      Meh, I just put the 3/8" guard on the clippers and simply trimmed him down. Easy enough when you’re not going for any style at all except short hair.

  • Redredme@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Hell no.

    Are you u all living in rosy mc Rosewood Santa’s little safe harbour everything is fine and dandy rainbow world? Or are you all lying through your teeth?

    Letting someone in your home with clearly visible psychological issues, in your circle of trust, filled with those you hold most dearly and packed with your dearest memories, that place… And then letting someone in you know nothing about?

    Hell fucking no.

    In the real world letting some rando homeless dude in your home has a 50/50 chance of ending up in crazy town. There is a high probability that you, yours or your stuff get fucked up. I cannot and will not accept those odds. Even a 2% chance of shit happening is a risk I’m unwilling to take when it comes to my kids.

    Would I help him? Maybe. It depends on some factors (like can I at that specific time, did I help him out earlier, do I have cash on hand) Would I let him in? No f-ing way.

    So real answer: money: maybe, eat & drink: anytime. Clothes: I’ve got some you can have, no problem. Bath and clean: nope. Never.

    • M500@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      This is my thought as well. Even if things go well this time, who’s to say they will not feel entitled to come back. Maybe with or without your knowledge.

      I’d send them away otherwise I might start getting a regular visitor to my house asking for stuff.

      In public, I’m happy to give money or food.

    • EABOD25@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      While I do agree with you. Your wording could be a little bit better. You seem like a glass half empty kind of person, and I can respect that. However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation. Mental health problems come in all shapes and sizes

      • Haui@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        As someone with diagnosed mental health issues, I can tell you that I mean no harm. But sadly, the pure difference in perception paired with unfamiliarity of the two parties makes the situation insanely dangerous, not the person.

        You never know why the person is in this predicament and if they have a tendency towards violence, robbery or other things. I‘m not saying they are. I‘m saying you have to assume they are before making that decision. Can you defend yourself against a pulled knife or even gun, do you have enough mental capacity to observe them at all times. Those odds do not look good.

        So, although I would never willingly look down on folks less fortunate than myself. I too will never ever let a stranger into my house if they raise any concerns.

        • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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          1 year ago

          “if they raise any concerns”

          Yes indeed, those words sum it up pretty well. Everybody is different. Every situation is different.

          Everyone deserves a chance though, with caution of course…

        • EABOD25@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          Very better wording. Sorry if I was seeming like a dick. I’ve always had the view that people generally mean no harm, but might have articulated it in the wrong way. I’m definitely trying to work on that with myself as well. I also have mental health issues, and I was homeless for a good 2 years of my life, and would have been longer if a person didn’t invite a scruffy person into their home and show them goodness and ask for nothing in return.

          After I typed that, I had to think about it for a bit. I was probably one of the few lucky ones. I’ve had the experience working in movie theaters, and I’ve encountered many homeless and have had good and bad experiences. The bad is more memorable (which probably says more about human nature rather than social conception at this point), but had many great experiences with homeless people. I have stories, but I’ll save them for the sake of typing a shit ton lol.

          TL;DR: I like the cut of your jib, you seem very intelligent, and have good points. However, I still believe the whole argument comes down to pessimis vs optimism. I’m a very long winded person, so tldr are hard for me

      • Ledivin@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation.

        He never said anything like this, and specifically called out pretty low probabilities throughout his comment.

      • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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        1 year ago

        Thank you for your opinion, every individual is different. Homeless does not inherently equate to psychological issues nor drug addiction.

        Sometimes people just had their house destroyed from a hurricane or tornado or whatever, and insurance done fucked them over, if they even had proper insurance in the first place.

        Sorry you’re getting downvoted, but you got my upvote. Thank you for having enough of a mind and soul to care. 🤗👍

  • stopit@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    The food and water part, no problem. Strangers in my apartment is a hard no! Sorry.

  • atro_city@fedia.io
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    1 year ago

    If I had time, I’d maybe tell the dude to wait outside, then get my loafers, walk with him to the shop and buy a meal. Strangers in my house? No thank you. Good way to get robbed in my neighborhood.

    There are free showers and halfway houses around here, so getting shower wouldn’t be a reason to knock on the door, I think.

    Optimally, we should be housing everybody as its been proven time and time again how much cheaper it is than leaving people homeless. It’s what I vote for every time, but somehow people are just too selfish.

  • Vanth@reddthat.com
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    1 year ago

    No, I’m not opening the door. There are tons of churches and a soup kitchen and two shelters in my town. If someone is knocking on doors of homes instead, they are up to no good.

    I am kind to the homeless by donating and volunteering within an organized structure managed by people who understand the homelessness problem and how to help better than I do. Not opening my door to strangers who want into my house is not unhelpful, it’s common sense.

    • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      Our local cities have been shutting down homeless assistance and food banks. Even the churches aren’t allowed to help anymore… ☹️😭

    • fine_sandy_bottom@discuss.tchncs.de
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      1 year ago

      100% this.

      I was a volunteer treasurer at a youth homeless shelter.

      Sadly, it’s not possible to evaluate someone’s intentions when they knock on your door and ask for a sandwich. They might truly just want a sandwich, or they might have other intentions entirely.

    • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      It’s not typically the person that knocks that you gotta worry about, it’s the person that doesn’t knock that you really gotta worry about.

      • Vanth@reddthat.com
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        1 year ago

        I feel like this might be one of those occasions where experiences and perspectives vary wildly by gender.

        A strange man having the confidence to knock on my door is not something I can translate into an assumption he is safe.

        • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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          1 year ago

          You should never assume any stranger is safe. But take each person’s situation separately, some struggling people are actually legitimately honest.

          • Vanth@reddthat.com
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            1 year ago

            Sure, but they don’t come conveniently labeled as “honest”/“not honest”.

            If they’re being honest, the kitchens, shelters organizations, etc will help them better than I can alone. (In my area where those resources are available)

            Someone who wants to avoid those places when they are readily available and instead knock on the door of a random stranger… we’re talking about increased odds of not-great intentions.

            • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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              1 year ago

              Honestly, the fella I helped didn’t even knock on my door, I knocked on his ‘door’, while he was resting at a local bus stop.

              I had already known the fella for a few months in passing on my bicycle rides. I realized he was a good decent honest person, but he needed a haircut and beard trim.

              Well, I happened to have trimmers, and figured that was the least I could do to try to help him out. That, and a pizza and a beer, just because…

              Edit: Yes, I went out of my way to help this particular fella, he didn’t actually knock on my door. But, what if it was 120⁰F outside, and some stranger knocked on your door asking for help?..

      • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        That’s not very true, unfortunately. Knocking allows someone to somewhat figure out if anyone is home, allows a person to gauge who is home (a man or a woman) and how easily the knocker can gauge overtaking them. Breaking in means the homeowner may have time to get a weapon and means the knocker will have to search for anyone home.

        Getting them to come up to the door and see if they’re armed makes it easy if a person is looking for a victim. People just breaking in are usually hoping no one is home and just wants to rob the place.

        • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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          1 year ago

          I guess it partly depends how far out in the woods you live. The dogs will announce an intruder before they even get 100 feet close to your home, and I had my cats trained to knock on the door knocker, when they weren’t out eating rats anyways…

    • over_clox@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      I never said I let him in the house, I trimmed him up on the back porch.

      Dude was old and all his belongings were in a single backpack, pretty sure that even if I had let him inside, he wouldn’t have stolen anything.

      Like seriously, where’s he even gonna put stuff? Homeless people don’t tend to have much space for extra stuff…

      • LesserAbe@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Good for you to help someone, genuinely. It’s a little weird you asked a question and then once people answer you try to debate them.

        Some homeless people steal. Not saying as a group they all do, but I don’t know which category this stranger falls in. Once inside my house they know the layout and perhaps see things that would be of interest to come back later to steal. Of more concern is I don’t know the mental health of this individual, and I’m less concerned about theft than my family’s safety.

  • grasshopper_mouse@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    First I’d wonder how they got through my security gate. I would not let them in. I’m a 5’3" middle-aged woman and I know my limitations, I’m not as young and strong as I used to be. I would talk to them through the door and not open it. If they said they wanted food and water, I might give them something but I would tell them to back up far away from the door before I put anything out there for them. Once they took it, I would ask them to leave.

  • ℕ𝕖𝕞𝕠@midwest.social
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    1 year ago

    Depends if I know them. There’s been a permanent camp around the corner from my house the last five years. My wife and I know a lot of the long-term residents and have helped them do laundry, charge phones, and file taxes. But a stranger? I’d direct them towards other local resources.

    • toynbee@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      File taxes? I admit I’m fairly ignorant of the plights of and unhoused person … And any complex tax situation, TBH … but it seems like most of them would be under the income threshold that would require filing of taxes.

      • alnitak@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Homeless does not necessarily mean jobless. You still have to file taxes if you want a tax return. It’s a lot cheaper to live out of a car and have a PO box than it is to get an apartment.

        • toynbee@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Fair enough, I hadn’t considered homelessness by choice.

          I know homeless people can and sometimes do have jobs, but assumed their income would be insufficient to require interacting with the IRS. Thank you for expanding my perception.