• Jako301@feddit.de
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      6 months ago

      They struggle with finding a good/the right man to keep long term, but simply getting a date takes half an hour on tinder while they can choose between 50+ guys in their immediate neighbourhood.

      And this isn’t even purely my imagination, it’s annecdotal from things my sister pulled off.

        • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.today
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          6 months ago

          The problem with Tinder is that most women will use it to date wildly out of their league. If you’re in the top 10% of guys (good looks, money, etc.) you can choose between 10 women to go on a date with every single night, so of course there’s no reason for them to ever commit. Meanwhile, all of those women who are dating them are hoping they can get them to commit if they have sex, which of course doesn’t work, because why settle for one dish if you can have a buffet every day?

          But after having had a taste of the top shelf, it’s difficult to go back to average, so now these women’s standards are totally overinflated. They think because they’ve slept with a top dog, it must be possible to marry him too, and so they won’t settle for someone in their own league, kinda like once you’ve had a steak at a $100 per plate restaurant, it’s difficult to go back to Outback or Sizzler.

          So many of them end up wasting their best years chasing the alphas, and by the time they realize it’s not gonna happen, they’re in their mid-30s, have gained 50 pounds from all the post-breakup ice cream they ate, and all the guys who would have married them in their 20s have either settled for someone else, or developed a massive depression, mental illness, alcoholism, or killed themselves.

          • boogetyboo@aussie.zone
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            6 months ago

            What the fuck are you on about?

            When you talk about leagues and alphas I wonder why the text isn’t green. And talking about women like an observable specimen in an Attenborough documentary - while using 90s romcom cliches like post break up icecream?

            You’re fucking gross.

      • lessthanluigi@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        Well, yea, but I’m fishing for a comment that will bring up statistics or give some insightful commentary or deep personal experience.

    • SharkEatingBreakfast@sopuli.xyz
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      6 months ago

      It’s funny in the sense of “are you reading what this moron wrote? They actually think this? Pathetic.

      The whole thing is so fucking ridiculous that anyone who truly thinks this way should be mocked.

      Most of the comments here are pointing out how stupid it is and talking about personal accountability and the actual reality of relationships.

      It’s not an endorsement — it’s a window into the clown show.

      • Franconian_Nomad@feddit.de
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        6 months ago

        True!

        But sometimes I just think it’s not worth it spreading the mental illness of others. Let it be confined to 4chan, where the post soon will be gone.

        • Instigate@aussie.zone
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          6 months ago

          I also think it’s not great to equate incels with mental illness. I have CPTSD, depression and anxiety and none of those make me act like a fucking misogynistic twat. Inceldom isn’t mental illness, and equating it to or calling it mental illness does a whole lot of people a massive disservice.

          • BigFatNips@sh.itjust.works
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            6 months ago

            Incellishness may not be in the DSM5, but personally I don’t think someone can be mentally healthy and an incel at the same time.

            • Instigate@aussie.zone
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              6 months ago

              Being an incel is a choice; mental illness is not. You wouldn’t refer to incels as disabled and it’s similarly unfair to refer them as being mentally ill. Being an incel is just another form of bigotry. Racists, sexists, queerphobes etc. aren’t mentally ill. The most generous descriptors I could give them is that they’re either misguided, brainwashed, or both.

              • Dasus@lemmy.world
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                6 months ago

                Being an incel is a choice

                It’s short for “involuntarily celibate”, though.

                Although I guess identifying with those words is the choice you’re talking about

                aren’t mentally ill. The most generous descriptors I could give them is that they’re either misguided, brainwashed, or both.

                I’d argue that their brains are at a state of did-order, be that due to someone having pushed propaganda on them or not.

                Some people are less capable of being critical of their own thoughts. For example, young children are very impressionable. Lots of people grow out of it. Lots of people don’t.

                If I harassed you with say, targeted ads and some videos I made on YouTube, it could definitely make you stressed out, thus me having affected your mental health.

                Now being a racist because you grew up in a small racist/sexist/homophobic town or something might not be the exact same thing, but the point I’m trying to make is that their wrong choices — like “choosing” (I use quotations because it’s not exactly a conscious choice people make, although displaying those attitudes definitely is) to be racist or transphobic or whichever kind of bigot — are a symptom of the disorder they’re having.

                That disorder usually being amathia, willfull ignorance.

    • Ibaudia@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      To be fair, when you’re touch-starved and attracted to women sometimes it really feels like they’re the most important thing in life lol.

      • Instigate@aussie.zone
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        6 months ago

        Straight men can, and should, touch each other more often (CONSENSUALLY. I can’t stress that enough). Hugging, holding hands, playing with one another’s hair, giving a gentle backrub etc. between straight men should absolutely be more normalised. We’ve been conditioned that any physical affection between men is a sign of sexual attraction, when history (and many extant cultures) show us that men can physically love one another without any sexual attraction whatsoever. The only reason we’re touch starved is we’re too afraid to be vulnerable with other men.

        • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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          6 months ago

          Not all touch needs are met platonically. Might as well advise touch-starved single men to hug their mothers more.

          I hug my wife all the the time. Just makes it hurt all the worse that she doesn’t hug back, let alone our other issues. Hug my kids too. Its not their job, or anyone’s, to satisfy every needy bastard out there, and yet: there’s supposedly mutual attraction for that.

  • j4k3@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Misdirection. The problem is the lack of public commons culture and gathering points in the USA. More sane countries have places people gather in the evenings without exploitation or stigma about showing up alone. Our car centric nonsense and sprawl are a massive liability for present environmental and social needs.

    • Illuminostro@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Uh, we call those bars in the USA. Not a big help if you’re under 21, I know, but if someone is motivated, they can find places to socialize with other motivated individuals. And turn the fucking phone off.

      • jjjalljs@ttrpg.network
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        6 months ago

        Bars aren’t really a great solution. Alcohol has a number of downsides. They’re expensive. They’re often loud.

        It would be cool if we had a wider variety of third places.

        • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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          6 months ago

          I might drink alcohol maybe one in a dozen-or-so times I visit a bar. Europeans visit taverns and pubs just like visitting any other restaurant. It would be cool if more Americans had a healthier relationship with alcohol, instead of living like there’s nothing between permanent and/or total inebriation, versus absolute sobriety.

        • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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          6 months ago

          Bowling Alleys and Pool Halls: Out for serving alcohol. A bar is just a more social restaurant if one can get over the fact that most people drink there.

    • Instigate@aussie.zone
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      6 months ago

      Simps don’t suck; they do the dating world a service. Anyone whose concept of self-esteem is so external that they derive it from the admiration of strangers is not someone who is ready for a serious or monogamous relationship. Simps help identify those people and weed them out of the regular dating pool.

      • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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        6 months ago

        Funny thing about those “unsuitable” people you’ve described: when they don’t get rewarded, and increasingly so for attention seeking behaviors, they find other outlets.

        Then again, there’s little for personal growth like taking a breather from having to struggle for food and rent.

        The worst thing about OnlyFans/porn is all the people who think as you do and consider those who “grow out of it” to be used goods. Definitely OOP and too many people today.

  • Ibaudia@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Take valid social commentary about capitalism’s commodification of intimate relationships and the impact that has on our ideas of dating

    Turn it into ridiculous, hyperbolic, misogynistic, victim complex nonsense

    Oh yeah, we’re greentexting today.

  • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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    6 months ago

    Anon’s got problems, and somehow that’s everyone else’s fault. Classic 4chan

    Anyway meanwhile in normal human land, the presence of pornography does not decrease the dating pool.

    • Instigate@aussie.zone
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      6 months ago

      Exactly right; sex work has always existed (relative to the existence of currency/bartering tribute and some semblance of homo sapien societies) and will always exist in some form. There have always been those who are willing to be in relationships with sex workers and those that won’t. The landscape has changed, but the world’s oldest profession remains.

    • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      It has decreased my dating pool by exactly 1. My ex started doing porn and I decided I couldn’t go back.

      Best thing to ever happen to me. No drunk texts and no forgetting why we split up.

      No hate on people who date others in porn. It’s just not for me.

      • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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        6 months ago

        I think my point really is that the number of people who are available to date hasn’t really gone down because the industry exists. Now you may not want to date someone in the industry, and that’s totally fine, but anon doesn’t even have anyone yet and is complaining about a purely theoretical problem as if it’s a real one.

        No, they have bigger issues.

        • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          I know. However, you said something that made my train of thought pull into a particular station. So you got a useless story because that’s what I do.

          And I agree with everything you said.

          • exocrinous@startrek.website
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            6 months ago

            One trick is to tell stories that don’t go anywhere. Like the time I caught the ferry to Shelbyville? I needed a new heel for m’shoe. So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. “Gimme five bees for a quarter,” you’d say. Now where were we? Oh, yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn’t have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones…

    • chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      I’m not siding with the crazy person posting the green text, just explaining their point. They are saying that the simps made it so profitable to be a virtual girlfriend that all women have become one, and there are no girls left that will date him because they’ve learned they can profit off of sex. When you really read it, op is an incel and believes the only thing keeping women from prostitution is the guaranteed paycheck. Op believes that once they realize the money will come in, every girl in the world will become a professional sex worker.

      • abcd@feddit.org
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        6 months ago

        Hope my math checks out. If not I’m sure someone else will correct it:

        I was just curious: With a projection of 9.000.000.000 people living in 2035: If 99% of the woman died as you said this would be 45.000.000 living woman. This would result in a population of 4.500.000.000 people in total. So we need to find a reason why half of the total population died 😉

  • FauxPseudo @lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I love the use of Molly Ringwald for the picture. The person who in all their roles wouldn’t be on onlyfans because each character was hyper concerned about being proper.