Like, yeah. Your great aunt Abigail who was always so bad with money that she and her best friend lived together in a one bedroom apartment for 45 years despite always taking vacations to Vermont and the third largest Greek island to celebrate their favorite poet was almost certainly gay. Maybe. There might be a clue.
But actual literal platonic roommates have existed for a long time. Like, it’s relatively recent that people started to practice living exclusively with romantic partners and family.
Yeah, I was just curious about Keilik’s world view in particular and how it led to them having this perception. They explained in another response that in their experience people could afford to live alone so it appeared to be a choice to live together (and then assumed it was romantic versus for other benefits like to platonic companionship/safety etc.)
But actual literal platonic roommates have existed for a long time. Like, it’s relatively recent that people started to practice living exclusively with romantic partners and family.
My instinct is to think that housing practices depend so much on social and cultural norms so it seems like this needs some really specific context to be true but then I catch myself realizing I have no idea what you mean about recent so I am in fact a clown for jumping to conclusions about your meaning 😅
To be clear, I was most echoing and agreeing with you, and I just had a sudden mental image of the world’s least subtle gal-pal-lesbian that I wanted to put out there.
And yeah, my “recent” is a pretty long horizon. It was in roughly the 1700s that we started to see people living less in arrangements that we would be willing to call “roommates” in the west. Largely driven by factors relating to industrialization making it so people who lived in proximity were less likely to work in proximity, and making it more feasible to sustain and manage redundant living situations. It was still common though, since the financial perks hit unevenly. Increasing urbanization pushed towards denser living, while doing more to move families into private housing. Hence the apartment with 40 steelworkers in bunk beds image, and the apartment next door with a pair of siblings, their spouses and children and maybe a grandparent.
This trend continues across a lot of cultures, although the specific arrangements vary. Industrialization being the turning point. Although the soviets had a more unique twist as a result of picking up entire rural communities and dropping them in low cost buildings. You get a lot of the communal living type arrangements we saw through history but stuck in an oddly modern setting, with maybe two unrelated families, a handful of singles and a few couples all sharing an apartment with one kitchen, a complicated bathroom and a bedroom breakdown roughly what we’d expect now.
One way or another, people throughout history have tended to want to live near family, which included friends, liked having a roof, and usually didn’t bother building more cooking tools than they needed. The specific forms have changed, but the social nature of humans is pretty consistent.
It really wasn’t though where I used to live, rent was cheap enough people legitimately wondered what was wrong with you if you had a roommate and weren’t in a minimum wage job.
Fun fact before Julius Caesar froze the rent in Rome for a year, it was actually getting to the point of abject absurdity to the point folks were splitting rent 4 ways minimum in some neighborhoods. Must’ve been able to smell the gayness apon stepping foot into that city, maybe that’s why Caesar crossed the Rubicon he wanted to get rid of the smell.
I think you meant homophobes? Though that doesn’t really make any sense either…
The only time having a roommate implied you were gay is if you were an older person belonging to the gentry who chose to live with someone else if you didn’t need to.
It’s not like people were looking at tenement housing and saying, oh yeah “that’s the big building where we store all the gays”.
People have always had roommates, they just aren’t typically the class of people represented in fictional stories of the time.
Because it’s not a fact lmao. The commenter is only 33. At no point in their life has having roommates meant you were gay. Maybe another 20+ years before them, and if you were a man in your 30s or older with a roommate. But that’s because the assumption is generally that if you’re living with someone in your 30s, 9 times out of 10 they’re your partner. Most people find a long-term partner by then that they live with.
Was not expecting this to be so unpopular but legitimately when I was growing up there were open mic nights and jazz clubs filled with musicians taking turns. People had weird exotic hobbies or fun cars they would drive on the weekend. There were artists and art galleries and little bookstores and microbreweries and hobby shops for anything you could imagine.
Now they have all closed, the jazz clubs bulldozed and paved over for parking lots, and no one does anything but work and be angry.
I remember a time growing up that people were paid enough to actually live and I refuse to let that die
In the suburbs in the middle of NJ. There were enough good Union jobs that even without a degree you could make enough money to live pretty comfortably, and the only notable thing about the area was that you could get to NYC or Philadelphia in about an hour and a half or so by train
Dude, you’re talking about 2010 like it’s ancient history, and I’ve got shirts that old. Everything you’re describing still exists, but I’m sorry if your town’s fun bar closed.
In 2010 things were already way too expensive, I’m talking like 2000-2005. I’m not saying that stuff doesn’t exist, I’m saying a lot more people used to be able to afford to do things.
In 2000, you were 7 years old and had no clue what anyone was paying for rent, much less how cool was open mic night at the local. Your parents could afford to do things and shielded you from what they cost. Or sitcom families could do things and you’re remembering Will & Grace.
I mean, yes: shit’s expensive today, but heterosexual people had roommates in 2000, in 1990, 1980, even in 1960. In 1980, it was scandalous to have a roommate of the opposite gender.
I have a special needs sister and my parents were so excited I was “normal” they made me help out and I grew up pretty quick.
I definitely was middle class, I started taking drum lessons early on and actually enrolled at the mason gross school of music at Rutgers when I was 11 and had been playing with jazz combos at those open mic nights since I was 10 or so. When I was 13 I did percussion with my teacher and others for a production of the H.M.S. Pinafore by Gilbert and Sullivan at a few different theaters in NJ. I auditioned at Juilliard when I was 16 but didn’t get a scholarship and realized I couldn’t make it in music the way I wanted to because I wasn’t good enough.
So I was taught how to budget very early on because there was a chance I was going to need to know how to do it myself, and all of the people I interacted with were in there 30’s and 40’s because I couldn’t relate to the kids in school.
So yea, I knew when shit started getting ridiculously expensive because suddenly everyone I knew was a struggling artist or had to stop and get a “real” job because they couldn’t pay their bills.
I am that old and this is patently false. Sharing a flat was a way to reduce expenses for my generation and generations before me. More common in urban areas. Also for women was often safer than living alone.
Yeah, and from my understanding there was an implication for people who had one after a certain age, that’s more related to the idea of “why aren’t you married yet”. There was definitely a suspicion when two 40 year olds have been roommates for 20 years and attend social and family events together, rather than two 28 year olds who met via an ad for a roommate in the newspaper a few years ago and are still trying to get ahead in the city.
I’m not that old and I can’t stress this enough, when I was a kid if you had a roommate it meant you were gay.
LMAO was this influenced by people pushing back on the “just gals being pals” trope and being like, “No Gladys they are lovers it’s okay to say that”?
Like, yeah. Your great aunt Abigail who was always so bad with money that she and her best friend lived together in a one bedroom apartment for 45 years despite always taking vacations to Vermont and the third largest Greek island to celebrate their favorite poet was almost certainly gay. Maybe. There might be a clue.
But actual literal platonic roommates have existed for a long time. Like, it’s relatively recent that people started to practice living exclusively with romantic partners and family.
Yeah, I was just curious about Keilik’s world view in particular and how it led to them having this perception. They explained in another response that in their experience people could afford to live alone so it appeared to be a choice to live together (and then assumed it was romantic versus for other benefits like to platonic companionship/safety etc.)
My instinct is to think that housing practices depend so much on social and cultural norms so it seems like this needs some really specific context to be true but then I catch myself realizing I have no idea what you mean about recent so I am in fact a clown for jumping to conclusions about your meaning 😅
To be clear, I was most echoing and agreeing with you, and I just had a sudden mental image of the world’s least subtle gal-pal-lesbian that I wanted to put out there.
And yeah, my “recent” is a pretty long horizon. It was in roughly the 1700s that we started to see people living less in arrangements that we would be willing to call “roommates” in the west. Largely driven by factors relating to industrialization making it so people who lived in proximity were less likely to work in proximity, and making it more feasible to sustain and manage redundant living situations. It was still common though, since the financial perks hit unevenly. Increasing urbanization pushed towards denser living, while doing more to move families into private housing. Hence the apartment with 40 steelworkers in bunk beds image, and the apartment next door with a pair of siblings, their spouses and children and maybe a grandparent.
This trend continues across a lot of cultures, although the specific arrangements vary. Industrialization being the turning point. Although the soviets had a more unique twist as a result of picking up entire rural communities and dropping them in low cost buildings. You get a lot of the communal living type arrangements we saw through history but stuck in an oddly modern setting, with maybe two unrelated families, a handful of singles and a few couples all sharing an apartment with one kitchen, a complicated bathroom and a bedroom breakdown roughly what we’d expect now.
One way or another, people throughout history have tended to want to live near family, which included friends, liked having a roof, and usually didn’t bother building more cooking tools than they needed. The specific forms have changed, but the social nature of humans is pretty consistent.
I’m old but I’ve always been broke enough to understand this was a joke?
It really wasn’t though where I used to live, rent was cheap enough people legitimately wondered what was wrong with you if you had a roommate and weren’t in a minimum wage job.
Damn how old are you. My coworker is in his 60s and talks about how rent was too high so he had to lease an apartment with roommates in NYC in the 80s
Cities are expensive, who would have guessed. I’m 33 and rent was $5-800 where I grew up, it’s now up to $2750-3750 for 1-2 bedroom apartments.
That’s a lot to pay for rent, but I guess US rent just hits different.
Wow dude, that’s the gayest shit I’ve heard all day 🙄
Fun fact before Julius Caesar froze the rent in Rome for a year, it was actually getting to the point of abject absurdity to the point folks were splitting rent 4 ways minimum in some neighborhoods. Must’ve been able to smell the gayness apon stepping foot into that city, maybe that’s why Caesar crossed the Rubicon he wanted to get rid of the smell.
Just because I have roommates doesn’t mean I’m gay!
…I mean, I am gay. But NOT because I have ROOMMATES
If your a top it ain’t gay.
I don’t get who is downvoting this and why. Bunch of homophones.
Yeah, shockingly some things were a lot better.
I think you meant homophobes? Though that doesn’t really make any sense either…
The only time having a roommate implied you were gay is if you were an older person belonging to the gentry who chose to live with someone else if you didn’t need to.
It’s not like people were looking at tenement housing and saying, oh yeah “that’s the big building where we store all the gays”.
People have always had roommates, they just aren’t typically the class of people represented in fictional stories of the time.
People report facts here and get downvoted.
Because they aren’t facts… Just because you weren’t aware of poor people existing before the present era doesn’t mean they didn’t exist.
What do you think tenement housing is, a gay housing project?
Yes but downvotes counts up to the downvoters iq level. Sometimes they get a hundred but not often.
Translation: “Some humans have negative iq”
Some humans have a sense of humor too. :)
Because it’s not a fact lmao. The commenter is only 33. At no point in their life has having roommates meant you were gay. Maybe another 20+ years before them, and if you were a man in your 30s or older with a roommate. But that’s because the assumption is generally that if you’re living with someone in your 30s, 9 times out of 10 they’re your partner. Most people find a long-term partner by then that they live with.
Was not expecting this to be so unpopular but legitimately when I was growing up there were open mic nights and jazz clubs filled with musicians taking turns. People had weird exotic hobbies or fun cars they would drive on the weekend. There were artists and art galleries and little bookstores and microbreweries and hobby shops for anything you could imagine.
Now they have all closed, the jazz clubs bulldozed and paved over for parking lots, and no one does anything but work and be angry.
I remember a time growing up that people were paid enough to actually live and I refuse to let that die
Where was this?
In the suburbs in the middle of NJ. There were enough good Union jobs that even without a degree you could make enough money to live pretty comfortably, and the only notable thing about the area was that you could get to NYC or Philadelphia in about an hour and a half or so by train
Dude, you’re talking about 2010 like it’s ancient history, and I’ve got shirts that old. Everything you’re describing still exists, but I’m sorry if your town’s fun bar closed.
In 2010 things were already way too expensive, I’m talking like 2000-2005. I’m not saying that stuff doesn’t exist, I’m saying a lot more people used to be able to afford to do things.
In 2000, you were 7 years old and had no clue what anyone was paying for rent, much less how cool was open mic night at the local. Your parents could afford to do things and shielded you from what they cost. Or sitcom families could do things and you’re remembering Will & Grace.
I mean, yes: shit’s expensive today, but heterosexual people had roommates in 2000, in 1990, 1980, even in 1960. In 1980, it was scandalous to have a roommate of the opposite gender.
I have a special needs sister and my parents were so excited I was “normal” they made me help out and I grew up pretty quick.
I definitely was middle class, I started taking drum lessons early on and actually enrolled at the mason gross school of music at Rutgers when I was 11 and had been playing with jazz combos at those open mic nights since I was 10 or so. When I was 13 I did percussion with my teacher and others for a production of the H.M.S. Pinafore by Gilbert and Sullivan at a few different theaters in NJ. I auditioned at Juilliard when I was 16 but didn’t get a scholarship and realized I couldn’t make it in music the way I wanted to because I wasn’t good enough.
So I was taught how to budget very early on because there was a chance I was going to need to know how to do it myself, and all of the people I interacted with were in there 30’s and 40’s because I couldn’t relate to the kids in school.
So yea, I knew when shit started getting ridiculously expensive because suddenly everyone I knew was a struggling artist or had to stop and get a “real” job because they couldn’t pay their bills.
I know I work my ass off yet can’t afford to do much
Rent when I was growing up was about $5-800 a month for a nice 1 or 2 bedroom unit, those same units are now renting for $2,750 and $3,750 and I’m 33.
I am that old and this is patently false. Sharing a flat was a way to reduce expenses for my generation and generations before me. More common in urban areas. Also for women was often safer than living alone.
I could be wrong but I charitably suspect they were referring to the term “roommate” rather than the actual practice.
Good to be charitable but they said not a joke later in this thread.
oh well screw them then.
Yeah, and from my understanding there was an implication for people who had one after a certain age, that’s more related to the idea of “why aren’t you married yet”. There was definitely a suspicion when two 40 year olds have been roommates for 20 years and attend social and family events together, rather than two 28 year olds who met via an ad for a roommate in the newspaper a few years ago and are still trying to get ahead in the city.