It’s just, too much, so much bad and evil happening and I can’t take it, nor can I look away.
I use these platforms to distract from the gnawing constant loneliness I feel that never goes away.
I can’t spend more than 5 minutes without a video playing or checking some kind of media to fill the void.
I’m feeling so suicidal nowadays, but I’m stuck in this existence for the time being.
I have spent decades in my mine, that’s part of why I do it, so I can get out of my mind.
Reading? do you like to read? Ive picked up reading more this last year or so, and Ive really come to like it as a different form of escape and connection. Even if its just reading for a few mins. Maybe it something you dont enjoy, but if you place a book out in your sight, maybe next to whatever you use for social medias, you might choose eventually to pick that up instead?
I been full mad at my phone often enough, for simialar stuggles, and I got so mad I started reading lol. It was easier when I put access to books front and center
Life really is just one big cope. Its absurd, but im glad youre here trying