i do not want elmo to raise a private army, invade a foreign nation, or quell a “slave” “uprising”.
Same. I won’t complain if he dies, though. Bonus points if it’s death by gold
This story warms my heart, but probably not as much as it warmed his
Sometimes history DOES have a happy ending!
Explanation: Marcus Licinnius Crassus was one of the richest men of the Late Roman Republic, and an extremely influential politician. He was a ruthless businessman, but at the least, he had guts and smarts. One of his most famous - and successful - schemes was to create the city of Rome’s first firefighting force - a private firefighting force, which he would use to buy houses on fire at fire-sale (dohohoho) prices, and THEN put them out.
If the owner refused to sell? Well, Crassus would wait. Then offer less money. And less. And less. Until the house was burned down, as it would have without his intervention.
Immensely shitty on a human level, but brilliant business sense. Very active fellow.
Thought you lot would appreciate that Musk fails to look human even next to aristocrats of literal antiquity.
Yeah, he was a brilliant negotiator when he had the upper hand, but considering the time his army got defeated and he got captured and the Parthians ended up pouring a bucket of molten gold down his throat for the lols I think it’s fair to say his ability to make a deal was pretty situational.
Either way, I was just thinking about Crassus the other day when I was listening to some Senate Republican ghoul talk about how he didn’t want to give aid money to California until they privatized all their forest land. Kind of amazing how much things don’t change.
