Don’t punch left.

Watch out for those finger guns, buddy.

Every time this person is in my feed it has been against my wishes.

Old copypasta. 🥲

Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can’t free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you’ve broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.

Fuck that algae.

Mine somehow morphs into a spider when I do the sheets.

♥️

https://web.archive.org/web/20250327000420/https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/26/us/ice-tufts-student-detained-rumeysa-ozturk.html

I laughed out loud even

https://web.archive.org/web/20250322022942/https://www.popularmechanics.com/science/a63917106/cells-conscious-xenobots/

Teach a man to fish:

• https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bypass_Paywalls_Clean (Chrome, Firefox)
• https://addons.mozilla.org/en-GB/firefox/addon/view-page-archive/

Its in the best interest for companies and tyrants to destroy the past so that they can sell you the future.

Marketing depts at unis do this shit all the time.

Yea, but this is kind of the lay up for doing that study. It’s how science works. You do a lit review and examine what data we have now, then you do that stuff.

Yes. He’s not as smart as he thinks he is, yet he is not as dumb as he portays. He’s dishonest at his core and it shows in the way he interacts with others.

Precisely.

The term you’re looking for is social capital and this is what I mean. We agree more than we don’t, but I like breaking the terms down a bit more for conversational purposes. It’s important to talk about these things.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_capital