

It is a matter of expectations. A person who grew up in X situation believes that Y knowledge is fundamental, while one who grew up in Z situation may of had zero exposure to or need of being exposed to Y knowledge, instead learning T knowledge which they find to be fundamental.
There is a book I have actually, the Book of Basic Knowledge. I would say there is a baseline that makes sense for everyone to know for daily life(basic mental mathematics, how to construct sentences/formulate thoughts, a basic grasp of history to help understand why we are where and who we are, etc.), but some might believe there is “Basic Knowledge,” that is outside the scope of that book, because of the logic I posited above. Or some might think that the book goes beyond Basic Knowledge. And some might just outright disagree with what I think is fundamental to interface with the world(though having lived in it long enough, I think what I put is pretty universally needed).




To steelman Ashen a bit here, it would not be the place for the hypothetical Femboy to reclaim a slur that was thrown at them because the hypothetical idiot was also just stupid and thought the Femboy was Transfem. It is not a Femboy Slur but a Transfem Slur, and a Femboy copping it would be controversial. There is already the tension that plays out between the two packs in the LGBTQ+ Clan, not really a reason to add more fuel to that fire.
You are correct broadly speaking though: The victim is in the right to reclaim victimizing language so that fools can no longer wield it as a weapon. It is just that in this case, the language used was not victimizing(in the sense of the word itself being degrading), it was the (assumed) context that the hypothetical idiot knew the person was a Femboy and used it as a double-slice against the Clan and against the hypothetical Femboy by mislabeling them in general.