i hope that in the next life I am not like this. I just wish I could go back and redo everything without being severely mentally ill. I spend every day in the dark lamenting and wishing I could just go back in time. I think about ending it so often. I just want a chance to redo and be normal so badly. the craziest part is that physically, everything in my life is fine. I have a roof over my head and food to eat. but my brain just focuses on the negatives so much. it makes me feel even worse, I just wish so bad I could redo my life without feeling like this.