Hello. I’m a forty-year-old man from London, currently working as a personal assistant for the daughter of a South Asian oligarch. For the sake of her privacy, I’ll be referring to her as ‘Geeta’ and give no sensitive details about her personal identity. Geeta is currently a twenty-year-old woman in London for university, living in a penthouse with her pet dogs, along with a maid and personal assistant. I share a small room with the maid in the staff quarters within the building.
As a personal assistant, my job is mainly to serve her outside her home, which means accompanying her to classes, shopping trips, restaurants, social events, or hanging out with friends, while the maid is mainly responsible for serving her inside her home, such as cleaning or cooking. Her own maid is South Asian, and has a good relationship with Geeta and myself. Geeta is generally a kind and loving person, but is highly vulnerable to different moods. Ask me anything.
Is there an understanding by Geeta of how the other half lives?
What, if any, distortions of behavior do you notice that you attribute to being raised that wealthy?
To be honest, I don’t see a difference. She’s like any other kid, only raised with more money. Her parents are very relaxed and lets her do anything she wants, but she’s mostly a normal person with traits that any woman in any social class would have in that age. She’s a wild and outgoing person around her friends, and could easily interact with people from different backgrounds. She has a decent concept of the value of money, but she doesn’t perform well academically.
How is she not super spoiled from being raised with this kind of life?
Does it feel like you are babysitting an adult who can’t function on their own?
It could sometimes feel that way, but I don’t have any negative feelings about Geeta. I’m getting paid a huge amount of money for doing fairly simple tasks, and she treats me kindly. She doesn’t have to treat me kindly, but she chooses to simply out of her own sense of good will. She rarely asks her staff for help, except for tasks in which she really needs them, like doing the laundry or cleaning dishes. That’s not her fault either. She was raised with servants all her life.
How did you even find yourself in that “industry”?
Ya this sounds like a pretty sweet gig.
Eh, I need my alone time and being at the beck and call of someone stastically likely to be a douche is not how I’d like to earn my living.
But I’m also not having a good time right now, so beggars can’t be choosers.
How does hanging out with friends work? Are you in the discussion, just silently listening or sitting a table or two away?
How much does it pay? Also, do you have a gamily of your own?
I’m not in a position to disclose my earnings, but I can tell you that it’s worth a fortune. I’ve been used to working in cheap jobs in the city for my entire life, and the current job truly felt like an upgrade from previous jobs. As for hanging out with friends, I usually sit on separate tables or follow her from a distance, but Geeta allows me to order food and drinks when we’re in a restaurant or coffee shop. She usually asks me to take pictures of them or carry their shopping.
Is there much of a job market for personal assistants? It seems like a potentially volatile job to have, since it seems like largely depends on the whims of one person. Suppose they just decide they have a personal dislike for you and then you’re just gone like that, where do you go from there? Is there an actual network of people you can through to get other similar positions, or do you start from square one and it’s just a word-of-mouth thing? What are the benefits like, is there any medical/retirement benefits?
I mostly try to keep myself from getting on her bad side. Geeta is a kind person, but she has very frequent mood swings and often gets unhappy very easily, so it’s always important to have the ability to read the room in certain situations when you’re in my line of work. I rarely express my thoughts and suggestions, and stick to my role of being a humble servant who politely nods at everything she says. I’m being paid to serve her, not to bother her with my own opinions.
What do you do when she’s in one of her down moods?
I’d love to hear more about the other part of the question - how did you get into this line of work and what will you do when this job is over? Like is there a network of personal assistants that you can go back into the pool? Also medical benefits?
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Do you ever “hang out” with her, like play games or chat about life? Are you supposed to try forming a relationship with her, or are you supposed to just assist her with her tasks quietly and politely.
Nope. I often prefer to keep things professional between us. She’s also not the kind of person to see me as a friend and confide in me about sensitive topics, but that’s completely fine with me. As long as she can keep paying me and treating me nicely, I’m more than happy to stand like a statue behind her shadow, since that’s what I’m being paid to do. She does engage in conversations with me occasionally, but never with an intention to purely confide or seek comfort.
- Do you get to pick your attire or are they strict and you have to wear a specific uniform?
- Sharing a room sounds pretty cramped. Are you allowed to have a pet or any companionship like that?
- Are you essentially off duty at home or are you on duty all the time? As in, could you go out and have a life?
- Is this a contract that has a specific end date or is this kind of an open ended situation?
- What do you plan to do if/when the contract ends?
Thanks for doing the AMA!
I know you said south asian, but is this the Green, the Orange, the Red, or the Island?
I’m curious because an oligarch from each of those options can mean every different types of people. South Asia is a lot bigger than some people think lol.
Also do you enjoy your line of work?
I may not disclose her origins for you. But I can tell you that I enjoy my job. It’s mostly better than some of the jobs that I used to be working for in the past, and with triple the amount of money that I made from them. All I can say is that Geeta has been living in Western Europe for most of her life since her birth, even to the point where she simply couldn’t speak her native language fluently more than she could speak English. She rarely even goes back to South Asia.
I may not disclose her origins for you. But I can tell you that I enjoy my job. It’s mostly better than some of the jobs that I used to be working for in the past, and with triple the amount of money that I made from them. All I can say is that Geeta has been living in Western Europe for most of her life since her birth, even to the point where she simply couldn’t speak her native language fluently more than she could speak English. She rarely even goes back to South Asia.
You share a room with the maid?
You mentioned she wasn’t great at academics, so do you help her with those or does she just get private tutors?
Are there things that she does isn’t allowed to do that you are instructed to either dissuade her from doing or have to tell her parents about?
Does she have romantic partners over?
How long is this assignment for and how long has you been doing it already?
Nope. Her parents won’t even bother to hire her a private tutor. They’re the kind of parents that are so relaxed to the point where they don’t care about her, which is probably true. She’s the youngest girl of the family, so she’s not really that important to them. She’s basically allowed to do anything that she wants, as long as it’s nothing that puts her in danger. As for her relationship status, she’s currently still single. I’ve been working in this job for the past three months.
I’ve been working in this job for the past three months.
Are you the first Personal Assistant she’s had?
And do you have a contact for a certain amount of time to be assumed renewed or could she straight up fire you tomorrow?
They’re the kind of parents that are so relaxed to the point where they don’t care about her, which is probably true. She’s the youngest girl of the family, so she’s not really that important to them. She’s basically allowed to do anything that she wants, as long as it’s nothing that puts her in danger.
At first, I thought this was sad, but honestly, I would have loved this as a 20-something. Do you know how she feels about it? I mean, at least she has plenty of money to wipe her tears with…
You probably don’t know answer for this, but here I go… Why is she going to college? It looks like her parents don’t really care what she’s doing. She is not doing well there. She probably doesn’t care. She is not the heir or even a backup. So she could be doing anything else. Is it just something to do, socialize or something like that? She doesn’t need college to find a job or anything. Like you said she has infinite money. If she was interested in the subjects and tried to succeed there, I could see that. But from your words, it looks like she doesn’t.
Are you with her during the lectures? And do you…take notes for her?
