I’ve been on HRT for 3 years, and I really have lost all hope that I will ever look like a girl or be gendered correctly or even just be treated with dignity. I’m really ugly and honestly I can tell, people lie and say well it’s your personality that matters. It’s really not that hard to see, and I am wondering if there is a point to spending 120 dollars a month, just for peace of mind.
Cis here. Your piece of mind is the one you create. If you want to continue then please do. If you feel like you are wasting money then stop. The choice is yours, always has been, always will be. Do what is best for you. It doesn’t change anything about who you think you are : that’s all that matters.
No. Because you’re not a man and your body undergoing testosterone masculinization would deeply hurt you Sky. You need some serious self care. It is a lot that you’re spending on hormones too and I’d look into ways that you can save costs a bit. Do you have insurance?
You have some cycles in your thinking that bring you back to these feelings of hopelessness and despair. And I think that you feel overwhelmed a lot, like your dysphoria keeps you very on edge. I think you need to make some lifestyle changes and I think you need to work to deconstruct how you think about yourself and your body.
My issue honestly is, I just hate how nothing I was hoping for with HRT was happened, I don’t look like any girl I’ve ever seen. I just feel awful and I’m treated by the public as such
I’m sorry you’ve experienced such awful treatment from other people. And it must be horrible not to have had the changes you feel should have happened. Women and girls have every kind facial shape and features imaginable. We all look different. There are loads of women with the same facial features that agonize you. And beyond that point, you yourself are a woman. You do know a girl who looks like you.
If there’s a specific way you want to look, a specific aesthetic you want to have, there are ways of achieving that. Many women in society have beauty routines involving hair and skin to look a certain way and to practice good hygiene and self care. I myself am one of those women.
It’s just hard knowing that you will always be neglected, everyone you have a crush on you won’t ever date, your always the one people go to but no one is attracted too. You are just reminded of it and it’s sad.
I understand how deeply this affects you. I know this advice has been given to you many times, but these struggles are affecting your mental health. You need a combined approach of lifestyle changes and mental health growth to overcome this.
I used to feel similarly and what helped me was bottom surgery. Dysphoria over my anatomy made it very hard for me to feel authentically me. Not that this is true for you or anyone else. Just that it wasn’t my jaw that was the cause at the end of the day, or my brow ridge or my cheekbones or how wide my shoulders are. It was just that I couldn’t see anything beyond my own dysphoria.
I’ve seen you, you have had much better results than I have had, I might have bad genetics and just look ugly. This isn’t my fault but the reality I live in
I was in no way dismissing the reality you live in, or your feelings about your body and your appearance. Only providing my own feelings about my body and my appearance and how those feelings have changed over time.
I have never posted a picture of myself on this platform and I will not be doing that, so I’m not sure how you have seen me.
You added me on discord I think
wtf you definitely pass (tbh I’m a bit impressed)
yeah you should probably work on your appearance (like in general, foe example maybe eyebrows?) but you definitely do not look masculine.(also is it ok to comment here if I’m not trans? this community just pops up every now and then on my feed)
Yeah it’s absolutely okay to participate if you aren’t trans, as long as you’re doing so in good faith, which you are :) From the sidebar:
Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
…so uhm I’m not sure about that “not trans” part anymore lol
Hehe oh sweetheart…you sound just like me on reddit ~7 years ago. Feel free to shoot me a DM if you’d like <3
I’ve never been told this by a random person in public
Okay, I’m sorry, I don’t want to come across as being harassing, I came back to check on the post and see what other insights people offered. But I had to write a reply to this.
You do realise that it would be impossible for a random person in public to tell you that you pass right? People don’t just walk up to cis women and compliment them on passing as a woman. The only reason the person you’re replying too can is because of the context of being in a trans community…
No your not coming across as harassing sorry, I was meaning that I haven’t been gendered as a women by random people in public I interact with
voice training, posture, general attire, makeup etc also all contribute. my mother has consistently been misgendered throughout her life as a cis woman because she doesn’t wear makeup, has a particular posture from working out/physical labor, and wears like jeans and masc-cut t-shirts. all of these things can be changed and posture nor voice training require you have money if you already have internet access.
Please don’t take this the wrong way, but some girls are just ugly? This isn’t even me making a judgement call on your pic, because even though I don’t think you’re ugly, telling you as much isn’t going to change your mind.
One of the most important things I learned during transition is that I can’t transition into a super model. I am what I am though, and no one can take that from me.
Being on hormones isn’t about being pretty, it’s about whether they’re right for you. Societal beauty standards are never going to provide you that validation, even if you meet that standard for now. Because you will grow old, and you won’t fit into them anymore. Self-love is forever though.
