Working on a website for my sister. I got some grainy gifs and a visitor counter. What else?
Two paragraphs talking about how great you feel about finally getting on the World Wide Web. Include as many typos as possible.
A dozen links to other websites (make sure at most only 2 of them actually work).
Excessive use of the BLINK tag in titles.
Copy and paste some random Ascii art but make sure not to use the right font so nothing aligns properly.
Real Audio music files.
Remember shoutboxes?
An image gallery for no apparent reason with photos of your pets and family with no apparent image size or dimension consistency. Different fonts on everything often in different colours. Random string of emojis that are not of the standard type (there wasn’t a standard yet). A background of a single colour or simple repeating pattern.
Ha. And everyone has red eyes.
Repeating background texture that makes the text a bit hard to read. Begging visitors to sign the guestbook. ‘Under construction’ gif for pages that aren’t done yet. Autoplay midi (probably not possible nowadays).
Tiled backgrounds but not repeating pattern
midi version of some popular (or relevant to whatever fandom the site is about) 90s song autoplaying and looping in the background
Important that it resets when you click a link.
Dankpods the Youtuber made one. Take a look: https://www.dingusland.fun/
For me it’s webrings. And, they’re back. I’m in a hurry so fame l can’t research for you, but, they exist.
Lot of people on neocities.org use them!
From what I’d read about it, search engines have become kinda shit, focusing on SEO and paid sponsored results than actually showing what someone searched for, so some small websites form webrings to help people find similar websites/interests while they’re on their site. I think it’s pretty cute/fun.
.wav background music starts playing and maybe you can turn it off. But maybe not.
Oh no way, had to be shitty midi covers of Beatles songs.
Random fact: modern browsers don’t seem to allow you to autoplay songs when you first visit a page, but it’s possible to autoplay music when you navigate to another page on the same domain.
Gradients
A page with links to your favorite web sites, usually some really popular sites everyone knows.
A FAQ page. Remember to have a snarky fourth wall breaking conversation with your own questions and answers. Don’t actually provide any useful information.
An obnoxious MIDI file playing in the background.
Don’t be afraid to add a lot of GIF images. Some sort of skull or that dancing baby are crucial.
If you really hate your users, implement the whole page in Shockwave.
Guest log.
Web rings.
“Secret” links like clicking on an unassuming graphic takes you to a secret page.
Contact info that includes a fax machine phone #
“Secret Links”, Like that one scene in that Sandra Bullock hacker movie, The Net.
https://triviahappy.com/articles/welcome-to-the-net-every-webpage-from-the-1995-movie-the-net
guest book
With a unsecured mysql database in the backend…
My provider has a shared CGI script that added the post at a special tag in your HTML file.
…and because of poor permission handling everyone just had write permissions to these files for anyone to edit.
ahhh, that dastardly Bobby Tables!
Dancing baby gif somewhere on the page is a must.
A random button that directs you to “You Are An Idiot” hosted on albinoblacksheep.com
Bonus points if you can get it to look like it’s still running on Shockwave flashMaybe a geocities domain?
@[email protected] @[email protected]
Geocities is required!It doesn’t exist anymore you’ll have to settle for neocities.org!
<marquee>Marquee</marquee>
Don’t forget to add a <blink>Blink</blink> to that marquee!
That tag hasn’t been operable in a zillion years
Scrolling text
Oh God no, I had forgotten all about that. That’s just evil.
Do it, OP!
